I recently discovered a new parent blogger-at first I really liked him; he's got a lot of great things to say, but then yesterday he said something that really rubbed me the wrong way. He asked for followers to send him pictures of their disabled children so that he can make a post about how gorgeous and amazing these kids are.
Now, in theory, that's very nice; it's nice that a rather well known blogger is bringing disability activism to the forefront of blogging...however...
Why in the world do people feel the need to say that disabled children can be gorgeous too?? As if someone were to see a disabled child who wasn't gorgeous (all children are cute little things in my opinion) and think "oh man, what a homely child" and then when they find out that it's a child with a disability say "oh man what a GORGEOUS disabled child"
Here's what I have to say about it: quit putting YOUR labels on my child; quit putting YOUR labels on ALL disabled children. Why in the hell are we stressing the importance of looks on small children? Why are they only "gorgeous" if we know they are disabled? It's a back handed compliment and it's rude as hell.
It's like telling me "oh for a fat girl, you're so pretty" or saying "Oh that gay actor is so amazing" WHY do we have to qualify it? Is it so incredibly idealistic of me to think that maybe, just maybe, we don't NEED all these unnecessary labels on our children? Even positive labels are still labels and they are still harmful to all of us.