Thursday, February 25, 2010

Thankful Thursday

A thankful Thursday post...on a THURSDAY?! WOOOHOO! This in and of itself, is enough to be thankful, but I'll post anyway :)

Today I am particularly thankful for Geo and my sister. Tomorrow I'll be getting on an Amtrak train (by myself! With a book that has paragraphs and NO pictures! With a diet coke with no baby backwash in it! Nuts on Clark cheese popcorn-all for ME!!!!!!!!) and I'm going to visit my sister. She lives four hours or so, from us. We're going to do girly things; shopping, frou frou drinks, and maybe she'll even do my toes for me?! Sunday night she and I are going to see John Mayer with some friends in awesome seats she scored for us MONTHS ago.

Geo is going to be on vacation as of 9:31 tonight and is going to have the kiddos all weekend by himself...or so he says, I have a feeling grandma will be over with dinner at least once and I have it on good authority that grandma is making dinner for all of them tomorrow night too...I'm thankful for her as well, because at least the kids will have more than pizza to eat this weekend (not that THEY would mind that though, they LOVE pizza)

Geo has already planned on watching movies, sleeping in late, and eating pizza all weekend long. Sounds like he's got the home front covered and Tori's got the weekend away front covered :) Woohoo! Weekend away :)

Have a wonderful weekend everyone, I'll be back to posting on Monday or Tuesday!

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Two is Better Than One

Geo and I have been married for approximately 3,459 years and counting* I would say that we have one of the strongest marriages I've seen. We've dealt with a lot in our many years together and have managed to stay not only in love, but also in like. We really really like one another still. Geo is the first person I call when I'm having a good day, a bad day, even a mediocre day. A lot of people don't understand the friendship we have; we truly are best friends. Everything we do is based on what is best for the other one. Yes, we are TRULY that annoying couple with the picture perfect marriage that makes other people gag.

Ok, that's not entirely true, well, maybe the gagging part, but not the rest. (no, actually, we are kind of annoying and we often unconsciously match each other when we get dressed, oops)

We have our share of issues, maybe more, than a lot of other couples, but for some reason, we've managed to stay married and provide a united front in the face of difficulties-and we've had a LOT of difficulties, specifically when it comes to Gabriel. Unfortunately, most parents of special needs children do NOT stay married. Some studies I've read suggest that upwards to 90% of marriages dissolve in the first year after a diagnosis is made. Geo and I have always had the "us against them" stance when it comes to pretty much everything.

A while back, I read something somewhere (how very vague of me ha ha)that says to see how in tune you are with your partner, you ought to take a piece of paper and a pen(cil) and write out the top six things that you feel are important in a marriage/partner. Thinking it would be interesting and insightful, I asked Geo to do it after I did it.

My list was: loving, supportive, humorous, amazing, faithful, and hopeful
His list was:love, patience, kindness, hope, faith, friends

Is there any doubt why our marriage works? We both value the same things, we both see the same thing in one another, we both have and work toward the same goals.

Geo and I have a VERY strict policy regarding one another: we do NOT criticize or belittle one another in front of anyone; regardless if we are with friends, family, or even on facebook. Too often, I think, people are quick to point out the ugly things about their spouse and do it in front of others who have no business knowing these things. Even in jest, we don't pick at one another in front of others. It's no one else's business if he doesn't pick up his sock or if I leave half full diet coke cans all over the place (it's true, I do, it's a horrible habit)

I always wonder about people who tear down their partners in public and on public forums; are they that bad when it's just the two of them? Do they really have that little respect for each other that they'd air everything in front of people? What does it say for the person themselves? Here you are, telling us that you married a huge moron who can't do anything right...what does that say about YOU?

When Geo and I got married, we asked that the traditional "love, honor, and obey" part of our vows be omitted and instead wanted to say "love, honor, and respect" each other. Respect has always been a very big part of our relationship; I respect him for so many reason-he's smart, he's a hard worker, he's an excellent father, a great son and grandson, and he's just a really respectable guy. He has morals, he is ethical, all the things that make up a GOOD person. How could I NOT respect him? By respecting him, I show him that I love him, and vice versa. I honestly think if we didn't respect one another, our marriage would not work the way it does.

I have a challenge for all of you married/partnered people out there...can you go ONE week without disrespecting your partner in front of people/public forums? (This means Facebook too! lol) How hard will it be for you? Do you think you can do it? I'd love to hear how it went...or how your relationship in general works. What needs improvement? What area are you strongest in?




*that is totally and utterly false, it's been eight years and seven months. It just feels like we've been married this long

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

An Open Letter To Little Miss Me Too

Dear SarahAnne, (Dear hey! I'm Bitsy, not SarAnne)
I love you, dearly (lub you dearly) but this echo thing you've got goin' on (echo fing goin' on) is driving me INSANE (you're insane momma)

Yes, it's driving me absolutely insane. I appreciate that you are trying to helpful, whether you are hollering to Gabe to "pick up the pace and get YOU backpack" or "you lunchbox is on the shelf, Gworge, it's packed alwedy" It's bad enough that *I* have to yell these things, but now YOU are going to do it too?? Never mind that when I say something and you start to repeat it before I even have the words out of my mouth no one can understand me. I have to repeat what I'm trying to say and then of course YOU have to repeat yourself. It's a vicious and annoying, to say the least, cycle that you and I go through all day long.

As much as it drives me insane at home, it's even worse when we are out because people think you are A-DOR-ABLE for copying momma. Either these people a)have no kids or b)have kids who USED to do this and think it's hysterical someone else is feeling their pain. Either way-ANNOYING-especially while at, say, a physical therapy appointment when I'm trying to schedule other visits. A small voice saying "no actually, Tuesday won't work" does NOT help because then the scheduler is giggling. Actually, little miss me too, Tuesday DOES work, so there. (Who am I kidding, it doesn't, I just wanted to have my own independent thought for a second there)

Thank you for your help Bitsy, but please, for the love of God, before I pull my hair out, stop repeated everything I say (stop wepeating what you say momma?) Yes, stop repeating what I say (ok, I stop wepeating everything you say momma)

Love,
Momma

(love,
Momma)

Monday, February 22, 2010

From the Mouths of Babes

Gabe cracks me up to no end; some of the things that come out of his mouth are hysterical and some of them are very thoughtful...

This morning he asked me to hop into his bed for a snuggle before he got out; happy to oblige him, I hopped in. He promptly put his arms around me and said "you're my favorite 30 year old mom" I thanked him and he went on to tell me that soon I'd be 31 (not true, I have seven more months thank you very much!) and then I'd be old. Glad to know 30 isn't old but 31 is...

Yesterday at breakfast, Gabe's friend asked if we could say a prayer before breakfast. Gabe yelled "I'LL DO IT!" and promptly folded his hands in prayer and said "thank you God for this breakfast, my friend, and I really like my bus driver, the captain. Amen" Geo and I were trying not to giggle since it was a very serious moment for Gabe, but it was so stinkin' cute, it was hard not to.

And finally, yesterday we went to the dollar store (a big hit in our family; a dollar goes a loooong way here :P) and Gabe picked up a kaleidoscope. He said to me "Look at my snipeascope" I had no clue what he was saying and asked him to repeat it. He said "it's my SNIPEASCOPE" loudly, loudly enough that the man next to us heard and started to laugh. He said "Sounds like someone has a career in the military in his future, since he keeps saying 'sniper scope'" I laughed and said "I'm not so sure about that, but I do know he adores his aunt and uncle who were both in the army and served in Iraq" the man thanked me for their service and promptly got slugged by his girlfriend. He started to laugh and she said "Don't let this guy fool you, he's a corporal and he's trying to get your son early" We thanked him and found out that he was home on leave for a bit before heading back to the "sandbox" God bless and keep you, silly soldier in the Dollar Store...and thanks for the translation :P

Sunday, February 21, 2010

200!!

Woohoo. In honor of our 200th post...two hundred pictures!!!

Just kidding, how about two?
Bitsy and Cicero


Gabe and Dolan, his "best" friend

Saturday, February 20, 2010

Wow

Today was our day to take Gabe bowling with his best buddy, Dolan, and grandma and grandpa. I'm fairly certain Dolan summed up the day perfectly for him and Gabe when he said "This is the best day of my entire life" as he and Gabe held hands and skipped to the bowling alley. Kids say it best, don't they??

Friday, February 19, 2010

Birthday Recap

Gabe is a popular kid...

Last night we had a small party for Gabe with some close family friends; pizza, pasta, soda, and of course, a Chicago Blackhawks cake and ice cream.

He had a blast and I have pictures, I just have to upload them :P

Tonight is bowling night, which means the kiddos will head over to Grandma and Grandpa's house...and Grandma is having a small party for Gabe there...

Then tomorrow his other set of grandparents is coming over, we're picking Gabe's best friend up, and we're going to Portillos (yummy!) for lunch and then over to the bowling alley for a few games.

Sunday, thankfully, will be a day of rest. Gabe's "official" birthday party isn't until March, really, because we are combining parties for Gabe and Bits. Two parties in the span of one month is not only pricey, but exhausting.

We were a little worried that he'd feel like he had missed out on something not having a big birthday party...looks like we were wrong :D

Thank you to everyone who called, sent cards, or wished Gabe a happy birthday-he had a wonderful day!

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

On The Day You Were Born...

(I'm posting early since tomorrow will be a busy day)

One of my favorite birthday books is called "On the Day You Were Born"* by Debra Frasier, we used it in our classrooms when celebrating birthdays and I've given it many times as gifts at baby showers. It's a beautiful book that reminds us of the day we were born.

Tonight while tucking Gabe in, he asked me to tell him about the day he was born. I told him about being so big I could barely fit in the car (very true, I couldn't fit behind the wheel of our car after about 36 weeks) I told him about all the people who had come to meet him (there were lots) and I told him about how gorgeous he was and how I was so happy to have him for my son (and I still am)He went to bed, peacefully, with a smile on his face while I tried not to cry thinking about what a big boy he's become.

I read "On the Day You Were Born" to Bits tonight, because I couldn't read it to Gabe...I'd like to share my favorite part:
"Welcome to the spinning world," the people sang, as they washed your new, tiny hands.

"Welcome to the green Earth," the people sang, as they wrapped your wet, slippery body.

And as they held you close
they whispered into your open, curving ear,
"We are so glad you've come"


Gabriel Alexander Witkowski, I am so glad you've come and I'm so lucky to be your mom...have a wonderful birthday little bird.











*find it on Amazon

*pop*

Oh poor Gabriel...the child has never been allowed to play with balloons because we were told he was allergic to latex (and since I break out/swell when I come in contact with it, we played it safe) Last night, however, we were out having ice cream and there was a magician at the ice cream shop. He was making balloon animals and Gabriel and SarahAnne were staring longingly at them, practically drooling. They were more interested in the balloon animals than their ice cream.

The magician came around and asked if they could have an animal. We figured what the heck, we have benadryl if he starts to itch we'll give him some. He and Bits got animals and were soooo excited about it. No itching, no swelling-definitely a good thing.

Today Gabe has decided to pull apart his animal and make his own. No big deal, just balloons, right? Well...because he isn't really familiar with balloons, he didn't understand that you cannot manipulate them the way you might think you can. What a shock when the balloon burst and flew across the room. Talk about heartbreak...the poor kid, what a shock.

Today he has reminded me, at least a dozen times, that tomorrow is his birthday. TOMORROW not a week from now, not two days from now, but tomorrow. He told anyone within listening range last night that he had a birthday coming up and has been bouncing all over, talking about it today. It must be fun to look forward to a birthday like this, huh? Goofy boy.

Blast from the past picture of McGee...he was about 18 months old in this picture...what a cutie!

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Ha ha :)

I saw this quote on a plaque today and it made me chuckle, thought all you married folks out there might like it too...

"Marriage may be made in heaven, but so are thunder and lightning

Monday, February 15, 2010

Oh really?!

I think our life may be a sitcom, all we need is a theme song.

Take today, for example, we went to go buy a car. (note to those reading: bad credit is bad, m'kay? take care of your credit so you don't end up like us and Jimmy V-more on him in a minute)

We went to buy a car, thankfully we CALLED before we went to the dealership because the car we wanted was sold on Saturday. No big whoop, we thought, cars are easy peasy to find. We went to a dealership a few towns over, granted it was small and looked a little seedy, but how bad could it be, right?

OH blog readers, let me tell you! We told Jimmy V what our price range was, what we wanted, etc and the first car he points us to is a HUGE old ford hoop-d. For those unfamiliar with the term "hoop-d" it means a big old gas guzzling car. Granted, six or ten people could have fit in the car, but uh, no thanks. We decided to take an Explorer out for a spin. Yes, there were some scratches on the paint, but whatever, it was purely cosmetic.

We opened the doors and were hit with an awful odor-dog-no offense dog people, but dogs stink. Ok, again, we can fix that. We took it out for a spin. Um, yeah, no. It was AWFUL. Every bump we hit, the truck rocked and I nearly fell out of my seat. The kids thought it was hysterical, us not so much. Geo then noticed that the "service engine" light was on. We brought it back to the lot and Jimmy V asked what I thought. I said "well, it's kind of bumpy and the service engine light was on" he looked at the truck, looked at me, shrugged his shoulders and said "m'eh"

We took another vehicle out for a ride and were scared to death...of it running out of gas. It was literally sucking fumes, I think I felt it die when we pulled in the parking lot. Nice car if you don't mind that the people in the back can't move their legs. Note: Gabe and SarahAnne LIKE to move their legs, this car was NOT for us.

Not wanting to be rude, Geo went to the "office" and took a business card. He came back looking scared and I think I heard banjos a la "deliverance" Turns out there was a giant dog chained up in the office and it was barking like mad.

The whole thing was so absurd, we couldn't help but laugh. Good ole Jimmy V and the dealership from hell...

As for a car, we're still looking and I know we'll find something soon, but man oh man, I hope to never repeat today's experience...next time the dog might NOT be chained up :P

Sunday, February 14, 2010

Happy Valentine's Day

Happy V-day to all of you who celebrate it :D We had a huge breakfast this morning together before Geo went to work and the kiddos and I have done nothing but watch movies, make popcorn bird feeders, and relax today. Geo and I don't really celebrate V-day (it always seems to be some sort of disaster when we do) so for the past couple of years, we've just gotten the kids a little gift. This year was no different, except that it's a whole family gift this year: a 15 month membership to the Brookfield Zoo!! Back in my teaching days, we'd get the educators membership (cheap cheap cheap!) and used it a LOT. We decided to get one again because it was a good deal and because the kiddos are BOTH to the age where the zoo is the most amazing place ever, even though we've been there a zillion times :) The membership is also nice to have when friends and family visit-who doesn't love the zoo?!? We're very excited about going to see the new Bear exhibit that's opening up on May 8th, though I have a feeling we'll be going MUCH sooner than that!!

I'll leave you with this--a reminder of what love IS and should be :)

Friday, February 12, 2010

Valentine's Day Miracle part 2??

After Gabe and my conversation the other night, I've been pretty worried about him. It's unusual for him to be so "down" and like any good momma, I was worried that he was going to stay in this funk.

Not so much. Gabe is, in a word, awesome. Today, while playing the role of CRAFT MOM™, I was able to really observe Gabe in his classroom. He didn't pay much attention to me, but I was paying attention to him and his classmates. Gabe is the go to guy in the classroom when it comes to having something read. If someone cannot read something, they go to Gabriel. Gabe is an excellent reader and apparently his classmates recognize that fact.

For some unknown reason, I thought that Gabe would be quietly (HA HA HA HA) sitting in his chair, limited by his cast. My God, could I have been any more off the mark? He was ALL over the place, helping EVERYONE with their things (he was finished with his work and his Valentine's day cards-it pays to be able to read, you can pass those suckers out QUICK!) Anyone who looked like they were struggling with something was approached by Gabe with a "hey buddy, can I help you with that?"

Man, he's amazing. I mean, he is just AMAZING.

I would have fully understood if he was crabby and cranky today; he's sore, he's sick of not being able to play in all of the awesome snow we have in the yard, and he hates having a huge cast...but he was up and around helping those who needed it.

I'm so lucky to have him for a child; they always say children are here to teach you a lesson, I'm fairly certain Gabe's lesson for me is that helping others, even while we are struggling with our own issues is the right thing to do. We should always help others, no exception, no questions asked, and there are no excuses for NOT offering a helping hand, because if a five year old in a bulky cast can make his way across a classroom filled with other excited five years olds to help someone who's in a panic because they can't read something, then what reason do WE have to NOT help someone who needs it?

Thanks Gabe, for being a reminder to do what's right :)

It's a Valentine's Day Miracle...

Or something like that.

Today, because I am apparently a glutton for punishment and have nothing else to fill my days with, I am going to be the "room mom" for Gabe's Valentine's Day party. Actually, that's not true, I'm not the room mom, I'm the CRAFT MOM™ (no pressure no pressure)

A few weeks ago, while preparing for the ever so important role as CRAFT MOM™ I did some serious internet research to see what the cool craft would be (total lie, I don't know what's cool when you're five, I know what's cool when you're CRAFT MOM™) (actually that's another total lie, I have no clue what cool is; in truth I wouldn't know cool if it slapped me in the face)

I found the most amazing project; it's a heart shaped bird feeder. We're going to feed our animal friends on Valentine's Day because we care about animals AND people on Valentine's Day, right? Yes, I confidently told Geo, and the kindergarten teacher, that I could handle it, I was ready, and it would be AMAZING.

Except that...the logistics may not work. For one, it involves large amounts of popcorn. (as a side note, the entire Witkowski clan needs to get out more; we excitedly watched the popcorn come out of the air popper like it was a new tv series involving hockey and animals or the Simpsons [Thanks to Grandpa Jeff for searching the garage for the popcorn popper!!} I've never seen the kids-or Geo ha ha-so excited about something in the kitchen. LAME ha ha) Large amounts of popcorn+five year old children=certain disaster. But but but! Let's add something else to the mix. WIRE! Yes, in a fit of CRAFT MOM™ amazingness, I thought it would be a GREAT idea to give the kids sharp wire and popcorn to create a bird feeder.

*shaking head*

What in the HELL was I thinking? Clearly, I wasn't. In a few short hours, I'll be putting on my shoes, grabbing four huge bags of popcorn, a bag of wire, and some yarn and heading out to Kindergarten. All I'm hoping for is no major disasters; no eyes being poked out*, no one choking on popcorn, no lawsuits...

Perhaps as a back up plan, I'll bring the air popper and the popcorn, if we get bored, I can just pop popcorn, if it thrilled US so much, it would probably thrill all the kids right?! Ha ha :)Wish me luck!


*that would be my OWN eye I'm referring to, of course :P

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

It was a bug day

My friend and I have a little "code word" system for how our day has been. If it's a "bug" day, it's been bad, if it's a "windshield" day, it's a good day :) (as in: sometimes you're the windshield and sometimes you're the bug)

Yesterday was truly a BUG day. We had winter storm warnings in effect, we had to take Geo to work so we could use the car (yay one car families) and Gabe needed to see his occupational and physical therapists. As it turned out, Gabe ended up needing to be casted because his range of motion was in the negative degrees (Normal range of motion is 20 degrees, he was in a BAD way yesterday) We ended up at the rehab hospital (where he does therapy) for almost five hours, which was fine since it was snowing and blowing like crazy outside.

On the way into therapy, we stopped to have lunch and SarahAnne asked me, quietly, "Why does bruhby have to wear braces on his legs? They aren't nice and they hurt him" How in the world do you answer that? I answered with "His legs aren't as strong as they should be, so the braces help him walk and run better" She accepted it with a shrug but hugged him when we got back to the table.

Then at therapy, upon learning he'd need a cast, Gabe flipped out. He told me in no uncertain terms that he was NOT getting a cast and he was not going to be happy if he did. Bits, the little momma, patted his back and said "It's okay, it's alright, it will help you"

We got the cast and headed home, with one very angry Gabriel in the backseat. He and I had the conversation I've been dreading for the last six years. The "why am I different" conversation I was hoping to NOT have to deal with a)right now and b)by myself.

It went something like this:
Gabe: I hate this stupid cast and I don't want it on

Mom: I know honey, but you have to, it makes your leg stronger

Gabe: Why do I have to have a cast, no one else does?

Mom: Because Gabe, when God made you, you had a hole in your spine, it's not fair, it really stinks, but it happened and now we deal with it and every once in a while you're going to have to have a cast so your leg works like everyone else's.

Gabe: I DON'T WANT A HOLE IN MY SPINE! IT'S NOT FAIR I DON'T LIKE THIS HOLE

Mom: *trying not to cry*

Gabe: It's not fair, no one else has a hole in their spine and I hate this. I don't like this cast and I don't like the hole.

Mom: I know Gabe, I know, I don't like it either.

And then he was silent for the rest of the trip. If you know Gabe, you know this is *not* normal. The child is a chatter box, especially in the car. My poor baby, in so much pain, both physically (it hurts to stretch like he was stretched) and emotionally. It had to be the worst feeling I think I've ever experienced, nothing I could do or say would ease his pain. Truly, a bug day :(

This morning, thankfully, he's in a better mood. He just took a marker and wrote his name on his cast and said that it's "cool" because he knows he's stretching and growing, so that's something. Maybe this morning's excitement shook him out of his funk-literally shook him. We had an earthquake this morning. First a blizzard, now an earth quake. Yes, in Northern Illinois, a 4.3 on the Richter scale, earthquake. So weird.

Today has the making of a "windshield day" for sure...I just hope it keeps up that way.

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Hey Spina Bifida...

Bite me!

Six years ago, we were gearing up to have Gabriel; a baby, we were told, who more than likely wouldn't walk, wouldn't toilet on his own, and would be very mentally retarded. The doctors couldn't have been more wrong...and as proof, how about a few pics of my "never gonna function normally" kid shoveling snow...




Monday, February 8, 2010

The Countdown Has Begun...

Next week something VERY exciting is happening...Gabriel is turning six...ooooh he could not be more excited about his birthday coming up if he tried. Every single morning and every single night we hear how many days/how many sleeps are left until his birthday. This morning while eating his breakfast he said "Hey Mom, it's almost 2-18 and you know what that means, right?" I played dumb and said "No, Gabe, what DOES it mean?" Exasperated he said "It means your kid is having a birthday, that's what it means" and looked at me disgustedly, because I'm sure he really wanted to say "How could you forget my birthday? MY SIXTH birthday?!" but he's far too polite for that :)

Ah the years have flown by...as my mom has been known to say, "The days are long but the years are short" and oh how true that's proven to be.

Saturday, February 6, 2010

Feed Me Seymour

Gabe is a string bean. No really, he's very skinny SLIM and starting to get quite tall. He's about 45 pounds soaking wet and appears to live on cottage cheese and air. People who know Gabe often wonder out loud if he actually eats and how he's growing so well on his all air diet.

In the last week or so, Gabe has been eating, I mean REALLY eating. We had to go out and there was a Portillo's near where we were going to be, so we decided to treat ourselves to a burger and fries. Portillo's burgers are HUGE, I mean they are enormous. I don't think I've ever been able to finish one of their burgers. They're delicious but enormous. Gabriel, my darling itty bitty boy, ate a WHOLE burger and half a large order of fries, and drank half of a large sprite for dinner.

Friday nights are typically a night for junk food, I don't usually cook because we bowl and last night was no exception. We snuck over to Burger King and had a quick bite. Gabe ate a cheeseburger, a small order of fries (which is actually very big, at least I think so) and drank a chocolate milk. In between fries, Gabe asked "If I finish this food can I have a shake, I'm starving"
Geo didn't think he'd finish his dinner, so he said sure and sure enough Gabe finished his entire meal AND then a milk shake. We came home and he asked for a snack! What in the world?! Can you say growth spurt?!

His birthday is coming and we've already decided any and all birthday loot is going toward new clothes. Last week we bought him new undies and socks because none of what he had in his closet fit him anymore. I have a feeling we are going to be dealing with a big boy with a big appetite in the near future. Geo tells me he's going to make up for the last five years of not eating by eating us out of house and home for the next five years...I honestly fear his teenage years.

No one told me that boys start eating like ravenous wolves around the age of six and don't stop (seriously, Geo is 32 and can still eat like a teenage boy, it's scary) If you need me, I'll be scanning the paper for coupons!

Friday, February 5, 2010

Let's Talk...

About the word "retard"...

According to one of my favorite websites, dictionary.com (yes, I am a dork, thanks very much) the word "retard" has been around since about 1480. It means to make slow; delay the development or progress of (an action, process, etc.); hinder or impede.

We all know what retard means, we all ALSO know that it's a derogatory word used to describe a developmentally or physically handicapped person. Retard/retarded used to be a clinical term to describe a handicapped person and is still used that way by some medical professionals, however as a general rule, most people who use the word retarded use it as a derogatory term, usually to mean something is stupid.

Now...I have a child who is, indeed, physically handicapped, retarded, if you will. I don't use the word retard to describe him OR any other handicapped person AND I sure as hell don't use the word retard to describe something stupid. I don't use the word, I don't allow my children to use the word, and I've even been known to tell people to STOP using the word in my home around my children. It's not an acceptable word in my home any more than the "n" word or any other derogatory word that could be used to describe someone/something.

It's no secret that I do NOT like Sarah Palin, can't stand the woman for a myriad of reasons, one of them being the way I feel she exploits her special needs child for political gain, BUT be that as it may, that's not the point of this. The point is, last week Rahm Emanuel used the word "retarded" to mean that something was stupid. I was taken aback as I pretty much love Emanuel and have been a big supporter of the whole Obama entourage since day one.

Sarah Palin, God bless her, took Emanuel to task about his use of the word retard and I thought "Well good for you, Palin, something we can both agree on. Way to go" I had a bit more respect for her after hearing her statement and then the seeing the way Emanuel responded. I thought it was a good thing.

HOWEVER good old Rush Limbaugh decided to go off on one of his trademark rants (gee, can you tell I'm a HUGE fan of his...or not) and used the "r" word repeatedly.

Now, this would have been an excellent chance for Ms. Palin to really get on the boat, to REALLY prove to me (and countless other special needs families) that she wasn't being political when she lashed out at Emanuel and demanded he be fired, that she GENUINELY did not like him using the word; a non partisan rebuke, if you will. But did she? No, she did not. She, through her publicist said "Governor Palin believes crude and demeaning name calling at the expense of others is disrespectful"

Well, thanks Sarah Barracuda, way to make old Rush feel badly. You call for Emanuel's job but can't even mention Rush by name when speaking out about using the word retard? WHAT is wrong with this picture?

Using the word retard as a derogatory slur is WRONG, regardless of who says it. Bi partisan politics be damned, it's wrong and Rush should have been point blank called out on it.

I'm sorry but if Palin REALLY wanted to be an advocate for her special needs son and all of the other special needs children and family in this country, she would have taken Limbaugh to task the way she felt the need to take Emanuel to task. That little bit of respect I had for Palin is gone because CLEARLY this was a political move, not a genuine statement for ALL special needs families and quite frankly, I think it's bullshit. She wants to be respected and thought of as a champion for special needs parents and children all over and can't even take someone like Rush Limbaugh and tell him, point blank, what he did was wrong. Ridiculous.

I'd be happy to tell Limbaugh, to his face, that using the word retard is wrong, it's hurtful, it's derogatory and it's certainly not appropriate for a person of his political and public stature to perpetuate the hate the comes along with the word retard. Grow up and broaden your vocabulary Limbaugh.

Maybe you're like me and don't like the "r word...if so there's a website out there for out there for you to show your support in getting rid of this awful word.

http://www.r-word.org/

Join my family and I as we pledge our support to eradicate this derogatory term in every day speech.

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Who is This Woman in the Mirror?

According to my darling boy, we have exactly 14 days-or 13 sleeps, depending on when you ask him, until he is 6. It's going to be an exciting day-school and then pizza and cake with friends-oh to be six again :)

Six...six...I've been a mom for six years. How in the world is this even possible? I mean, I know I'm a mom, the whole giving birth-nursing-never sleeping-changing diapers-teething-toddling-growing up quicker moments have me pegged squarely in the "mom" category.

But what else? How else do I know that I'm a mom? Let's start at the top and work our way down, shall we?

Hair: I have "mom" hair. It's currently in a ponytail because making cookies with your hair in your face is never a good thing. It's colored (lightly, I swear lol)to cover the grey hair that is showing up in alarming numbers these days. It's not super short a la Sarah McLachlan in the 90's nor is it long and sexy a la Sarah McLachlan today. It's mid length, it's dyed to cover the grey and it's currently in a pony tail. I would definitely say this is "mom" hair.

Face: My face hasn't seen more than two full applications of make up since having SarahAnne nearly three years ago. Why? Because if I put it on, I have to take it off. I cannot, like in my younger days, just hop into bed with make up on and wake up none the worse for wear. If I don't take the make up off, it ruins the pillow cases-and since they were kind of expensive, unlike those I had in college, and they MATCH our bedsheets-again, unlike those in college-I really do not want them covered in mascara, foundation, and blue eye shadow (side note: what in the HELL was I thinking wearing blue eye shadow??) There's a whole routine that goes along with getting my face ready for bed...wrinkles be damned, I'm not about to ruin the oils, lotions and potions, and 20 minute routine with make up. (side note number 2: this is a slight exaggeration, it does not take a ton of time nor product to get ready for bed unless, of course, I noticed that there's a new line on the side of my eyes or near my mouth...ha ha) Never mind that neither kid likes being kissed when mom is wearing lipstick and being poked repeatedly in the eye while being asked 'what's this blue stuff on your eyes mom?' is rather uncomfortable. Yeah, mom face.

Hands: Do we really have to go there? Alright, we will...short clipped nails-the better to do dishes, laundry, and finger painting with my dears :) I am fairly certain SarahAnne wears more nail polish than I do. Back in my pre mom days, you might have found a beer in my hand...not so now, living on the edge for me is a diet coke with a lime wedge...and more often than not, I'm just drinking water. Life on the edge my friends, life on the edge!

Body: Stretch marks. Need I say more? I mean, really, what else screams "MOM" like stretch marks? At least, though, they are interesting stretch marks. Once while teaching my very large, very stretch marked stomach made an (accidental) appearance in my class. I was then informed by a helpful child that I had a "Harry Potter" lightning bolt on my stomach. Great to know that "he who shall not be named" couldn't defeat my stomach either...

Shoes: I am NOT embarrassed to tell you all that I love my Crocs. That's right, I wear Crocs. Every single day, even when it's snowing. Geo tells me I should be ashamed of myself because they are CROCS but I find it very hard to be embarrassed when I'm comfortable no matter where I am. Now if only I could find dress Crocs, I'd never have to wear uncomfortable, tight shoes again. Yay Crocs! (what?)

And finally, the clothes, the mom clothes: Yoga pants (check) Old Navy T-shirt (check) Someone else's socks because all of mine are gone (check) Crocs (check check and CHECK)

And that's how I know I am a mom. I have the uniform, I have the attitude, I have the ponytail and the crocs...It's been a gradual revolution, but it seems to me that I can't even remember what I used to look like. I think I left the hospital in 2004 looking like this, which, really, if you think about it, probably isn't a good thing...but what to do about it? Perhaps, a la Rants from Mommyland I shall try a 30 day program to look more like Chrissi and less like Gabe and Bitsy's mom...yes, that's what we'll do. More shoe laces, less crocs (*cries*) more buttons, less yoga pants, and more hair brushing and less pony tails. It ought to be an adventure...one I'm sure will be chronicled here in the Wit Family blog. First things first-I need to change the pillowcases...I'd really hate for them to be ruined by my blue eyeshadow :)

(and check out Rants From MommyLand to check out Lydia's progress..)

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

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