Oasis: something serving as a refuge, relief, or pleasant change from what is usual, annoying, difficult, etc.
Years ago, I attended a seminar on making your classroom an oasis for students. We were urged to shelter our students, keep them safe from "the world", help them feel comfortable enough that they felt they were able to make mistakes without judgement from those who might not understand what the process they were going through was.
I've always felt that was the way a family should operate; we ought to make our children feel comfortable in their own homes. They should be free to be themselves, whether that means, oh I don't know, wanting to learn about jets for six weeks straight then jumping onto learning about the human body for a month or so (ya know, just an example haha) or dressing in orange shirts, striped shirts, and mismatched socks. They should feel free to express their emotions-positive or negative. They should be free from judgement. They should feel safe. They should be happy. They should know that no matter what happens, they will always have a group of people around them who will love and accept them despite the shortcomings society may think they have. They should know that no matter what labels are put on them by society, we don't care, they are who they are.
I think this is ESPECIALLY important when you have a child with special needs and I think it's especially important for the PARENTS of that child to have a family oasis. A shoulder to cry on, a person to say "damn that sucks" and "how can I help?" People who are there for you and accept you and your kiddo despite the fact that they frustrate the crap out of everyone; people who understand that kids are kids and EVERY kid comes with a set of challenges that are unique to them.
Sometimes though, it's just not feasible for the parents to have that oasis; sometimes it's up to them to create their own oasis within their own home, their own circle of friends, and maybe even on line. I'm so thankful that our oasis, while not perfect, has a great mix of family, friends, both near and far, and friends whom I've never met "in person" but feel connected to. It's nice to have someone to turn to when life becomes too much to deal with; when the stress levels are so high you could scream; when you absolutely do not how in the hell you are going to continue on when everything seems so defeating.
And on a sillier note, there's someone in OUR Oasis who happens to LOVE the band Oasis, so for him I present you with...nothing because apparently you cannot link youtube videos into blogger anymore...sorry Uncle Dole :P
Showing posts with label momma musings. Show all posts
Showing posts with label momma musings. Show all posts
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
Friday, January 6, 2012
I Can Clearly See Your Nuts
We have a really great park near the house that happens to go around a super old cemetery (which Gabe is fascinated by, but that's another post for another day) and we decided to take a walk on the path around the cemetery and see where it led. It led us to thru a gorgeous patch of woods where we saw two small red headed woodpeckers who seemed to think we were no threat because they landed on branches no further than ten feet from us-almost as if to say "oh sure, take a look at us!" They were gorgeous.
As we walked my leg got snagged on a picker bush and I hollered OUCH! Bits, ever the little momma, asked "oh what's wrong momma?" I told her a picker bush got me and she wrapped her arm around my leg and pulled me close and said "ok then, just walk with me, I won't let the pickers get you anymore, ok?" and at that moment I realized something...
I realized that in just a few short months my little momma, my shadow for the last nearly five years, my itty bitty baby girl is going to be going to school and for the first time since she was born, I'm going to be on my own for a few hours every.single.day. I almost can't fathom this. When Gabe went to school I was relieved; he was so bored at home and I had Bits to take care of. He settled into school very easily; he loves to learn, he loves being surrounded by other kids, the whole bit. He's very independent, always has been.
Bits, on the other hand, has always been a momma's girl. Never wanting to be further than a few arm lengths away from me, even at night. She never wanted to go to dance by herself, never wanted to go on playdates...all of that is changing though. She loves dance class with "the big girls". She ASKS to go to the gym so she can play with her friends, and she doesn't seem to need me 24/7 anymore, something I thought would never happen. Something I swore I would rejoice over when it finally happened but yet...I can't help feeling like I'm not really ready for this. I'm not ready for my itty bitty to be not so itty bitty.
As we walked along the path with her arm wrapped around my leg, chatting about what we saw and what we thought, I realized that she really IS independent and it happened in the blink of an eye. We continued on with our walk, seeing ducks and geese, petting dogs, and stopping for a good five minutes to watch a nutkins (that'd be a squirrel in this family) chew on a black walnut, only leaving when he tossed the empty nut shell down and Bits was able to pick it up and put it in her pocket. We sat and talked to ducks, we saw ANOTHER woodpecker (busy birds today) and then we saw a gorgeous red tailed hawk before crossing the street and finding our way back into our neighborhood.
The above picture was taken by mini momma; she thought it would be cool to see what the nutshells looked like in a picture. Turned out pretty well I think, just like her...and hopefully, me too, when I'm on my own picking up nutshells and watching birds with no one to protect me from the picker bushes.
Thursday, October 20, 2011
Something completely different
I've entered a writing challenge and thought it might be nice if I share some of the entries with my blog readers...I won't post every entry as I'm sure they won't all be interesting, but I liked this one and thought I'd share. The topic was:
When you pray, move your feet
And here it is...
Dear Gabriel,
When I prayed, YOU moved your feet.
I don't put much stock in prayer; the thought of saying things out loud to "God" seems ridiculous to my logical brain and yet...I prayed for you every single day I knew what was in store for you. I prayed to God, Buddha, the universe....anyone who might hear my cries and answer my request, anyone or anything that might help ease the anxiety, fear, and pain I was feeling. I knew you'd never be society's standard of normal or typical, but I prayed you'd be the best you you could be...
And at 22 months, after literally praying for years, you moved your feet and you walked.
I prayed and you moved your feet.
But...was it prayer that made you move your feet? Of course it wasn't. In case you aren't aware of the meaning of the phrase "When you pray, move your feet" (and I wasn't until tonight) it basically means, God helps those who help themselves-basically talk the talk and walk the walk-make sure you aren't just putting those words out into the universe and thinking that's all you have to do.
Did I pray for walking? Yes, of course I did. Did I do anything to make sure you would walk? You're damn right I did. Hours and hours and more hours of therapy and research and tears and frustration and literally a million dollars in medical debt and YOU moved your feet.
One of my biggest hopes for you, Gabe is that you always remember that words are just words and mean nothing if you don't put actions behind them. You can talk till you're blue in the face but at the end of the day, if all you've done is talk, you've accomplished nothing. Be a man of action, not words and you, too, will see that when YOU pray FEET will move.
Love,
Momma
When you pray, move your feet
And here it is...
Dear Gabriel,
When I prayed, YOU moved your feet.
I don't put much stock in prayer; the thought of saying things out loud to "God" seems ridiculous to my logical brain and yet...I prayed for you every single day I knew what was in store for you. I prayed to God, Buddha, the universe....anyone who might hear my cries and answer my request, anyone or anything that might help ease the anxiety, fear, and pain I was feeling. I knew you'd never be society's standard of normal or typical, but I prayed you'd be the best you you could be...
And at 22 months, after literally praying for years, you moved your feet and you walked.
I prayed and you moved your feet.
But...was it prayer that made you move your feet? Of course it wasn't. In case you aren't aware of the meaning of the phrase "When you pray, move your feet" (and I wasn't until tonight) it basically means, God helps those who help themselves-basically talk the talk and walk the walk-make sure you aren't just putting those words out into the universe and thinking that's all you have to do.
Did I pray for walking? Yes, of course I did. Did I do anything to make sure you would walk? You're damn right I did. Hours and hours and more hours of therapy and research and tears and frustration and literally a million dollars in medical debt and YOU moved your feet.
One of my biggest hopes for you, Gabe is that you always remember that words are just words and mean nothing if you don't put actions behind them. You can talk till you're blue in the face but at the end of the day, if all you've done is talk, you've accomplished nothing. Be a man of action, not words and you, too, will see that when YOU pray FEET will move.
Love,
Momma
Saturday, October 15, 2011
Friends....
"God doesn't give you the people you want, he gives you the people you need. To help you, to hurt you, to leave you, to love you, and to make you the person you were meant to be"
And lately I've found this to be incredibly true...and for those reading, I hope you realize which one of these you are. I've learned a hard lesson these last few weeks and that is that some people, despite what you had hoped, what you had thought, and what you'd seen have no regard for you. Some people come into your life for the sole purpose to test you and try and take away what you have. In this case though, my happiness cannot and WILL not be destroyed by anyone, nor will my marriage or family. Misery loves company, however there's no company to be found here.
Saturday, September 10, 2011
The Days are Long, The Years are Short
HH and I just had our tenth wedding anniversary at the end of July; for whatever reason, I seem to think of people's children in relation to how old they were at our wedding. It doesn't make much sense, but it's how I do it...
There was a gawky kind of awkward 12 year old boy at our wedding whom I danced with. That 12 year old is now 22, has a beautiful fiance, and a baby on the way. Um...how did that happen?
Another little one at our wedding was newly eight and just wanted to dance with the bride; she was a cute little blonde who ended up going home with all of my wedding jewelry (no worries, it was all fake and I made it ha ha) This little blonde? Well you guessed it, she's 18 and just started her freshman year at Iowa State. She's a Hawkeye now...how did that happen?
Yesterday was my sweet little biver bips, er, liver lips, er uh, godson Cameron's 11th birthday. ELEVEN! EEE-LEH-VIN! At my wedding? Well he wasn't there, but he was itty bitty and probably wearing his favorite camouflage onesie. I don't see him as an eleven year old, I see him as a little guy with a dish of spaghetti on his head, I see him as a toddler with the letter "K" from his magnetic alphabet pretending to spray things and clean them, I see him as a toothly 7 year old sprawled out on my bed reading Calvin and Hobbes. Not an 11 year old who can carry on a conversation with his Aunt Chrissi and actually make sense. Not an 11 year old who's headed toward puberty in a big way. Not an 11 year old who is closer to 18 than to being 1 (sorry Amanda, but it's true...)
And my own itty bitty, small, tiny, definitely not closer to 8 than 7 Gabriel McGoochenstein. The other night, he was so sick and ended up spiking a 105 fever. I was panicking because 105 is so high and he's so little...I called the doctor who calmly talked me through my hysterics (I tend to talk and talk and talk and talk and talk some more when I'm hysterical-I talk about 10 times as much as normal which is a lot anyway lol) He calmly asked "and how old is Gabe now?" I said "he's seven and a half and his fever...." he cut me off and said "relax mom, he's a big kid now, this isn't a big deal" I said "what do you mean, he's a BIG kid now? No he is not...ramble ramble". After I got off the phone I realized that the doctor was right, he IS a big kid now. He's no longer my itty bitty needs me for everything guy. He's almost 8; he doesn't even kiss me at the bus stop anymore for pete's sake.
How did this happen? How did ALL of these children, including my own, get so damn old? Furthermore, how did *I* get so damn old? When did this happen? As my mom is fond of saying "The days are long but the years are short" She's right, as usual and I'm betting she feels the same way about me...
There was a gawky kind of awkward 12 year old boy at our wedding whom I danced with. That 12 year old is now 22, has a beautiful fiance, and a baby on the way. Um...how did that happen?
Another little one at our wedding was newly eight and just wanted to dance with the bride; she was a cute little blonde who ended up going home with all of my wedding jewelry (no worries, it was all fake and I made it ha ha) This little blonde? Well you guessed it, she's 18 and just started her freshman year at Iowa State. She's a Hawkeye now...how did that happen?
Yesterday was my sweet little biver bips, er, liver lips, er uh, godson Cameron's 11th birthday. ELEVEN! EEE-LEH-VIN! At my wedding? Well he wasn't there, but he was itty bitty and probably wearing his favorite camouflage onesie. I don't see him as an eleven year old, I see him as a little guy with a dish of spaghetti on his head, I see him as a toddler with the letter "K" from his magnetic alphabet pretending to spray things and clean them, I see him as a toothly 7 year old sprawled out on my bed reading Calvin and Hobbes. Not an 11 year old who can carry on a conversation with his Aunt Chrissi and actually make sense. Not an 11 year old who's headed toward puberty in a big way. Not an 11 year old who is closer to 18 than to being 1 (sorry Amanda, but it's true...)
And my own itty bitty, small, tiny, definitely not closer to 8 than 7 Gabriel McGoochenstein. The other night, he was so sick and ended up spiking a 105 fever. I was panicking because 105 is so high and he's so little...I called the doctor who calmly talked me through my hysterics (I tend to talk and talk and talk and talk and talk some more when I'm hysterical-I talk about 10 times as much as normal which is a lot anyway lol) He calmly asked "and how old is Gabe now?" I said "he's seven and a half and his fever...." he cut me off and said "relax mom, he's a big kid now, this isn't a big deal" I said "what do you mean, he's a BIG kid now? No he is not...ramble ramble". After I got off the phone I realized that the doctor was right, he IS a big kid now. He's no longer my itty bitty needs me for everything guy. He's almost 8; he doesn't even kiss me at the bus stop anymore for pete's sake.
How did this happen? How did ALL of these children, including my own, get so damn old? Furthermore, how did *I* get so damn old? When did this happen? As my mom is fond of saying "The days are long but the years are short" She's right, as usual and I'm betting she feels the same way about me...
Monday, August 22, 2011
Darned if you do, darned if you don't.
I feel a rant coming on; a feminist rant actually. A damned if you do, damned if you don't rant. Yesterday an article hit the web entitled Tough Gals: Do They Still Exist. It was an article that basically said women are becoming too "girly". We're too girly because we blog about gardening, knitting, and cooking.
Yes, you read that right, WOMEN are TOO girly.
I'll let that sink in for a second...
It used to be that women were too "manly"; that we were trying too hard to be like men. The backlash over female politicians is just ONE example of women trying too hard to fit into a "man's world". Apparently women are no longer allowed to be girly, we must be tough, except that when we're tough, we're no longer girly and as EVERYONE knows (insert eye roll here) that's just not attractive.
It seems like women just can't do right by ANYONE. You're either too feminine or too masculine, you're either super mom or a horrible mom, you're either an overly devoted and submissive wife or you're the wife who has her husband's testicles in "her purse"
There is no middle ground when it comes to how we're judged; it's always got to be one extreme or the other. We fought for equality, we continue to strive to make this world a friendly place for our daughters, nieces, and sisters and every other woman out there. We don't want to be seen as the "weaker sex" (because honestly, it's not true-what man do you know can squeeze a watermelon out of a lemon hole and be up walking shortly thereafter?) Women before my generation fought so that we could be tough OR girly...or a combination of BOTH. They fought so WE didn't have to fight for these things...and yet, here we are, all these years later STILL fighting for the right to be ourselves...whether we're ball busting politicians, girly cupcake baking bloggers, or somewhere in the middle.
It seems like it's a never ending battle; as women we'll never please anyone...so we might as well please ourselves, huh? So keep on you cupcake bloggers, you kick ass front line military women, and you somewhere in the middle ladies going about your day to day business. You don't have to live up to anyone's standards and expectations than your own-that's what generations of women before us have fought for-the right to be ourselves-don't let small minded people take that away from you.
Yes, you read that right, WOMEN are TOO girly.
I'll let that sink in for a second...
It used to be that women were too "manly"; that we were trying too hard to be like men. The backlash over female politicians is just ONE example of women trying too hard to fit into a "man's world". Apparently women are no longer allowed to be girly, we must be tough, except that when we're tough, we're no longer girly and as EVERYONE knows (insert eye roll here) that's just not attractive.
It seems like women just can't do right by ANYONE. You're either too feminine or too masculine, you're either super mom or a horrible mom, you're either an overly devoted and submissive wife or you're the wife who has her husband's testicles in "her purse"
There is no middle ground when it comes to how we're judged; it's always got to be one extreme or the other. We fought for equality, we continue to strive to make this world a friendly place for our daughters, nieces, and sisters and every other woman out there. We don't want to be seen as the "weaker sex" (because honestly, it's not true-what man do you know can squeeze a watermelon out of a lemon hole and be up walking shortly thereafter?) Women before my generation fought so that we could be tough OR girly...or a combination of BOTH. They fought so WE didn't have to fight for these things...and yet, here we are, all these years later STILL fighting for the right to be ourselves...whether we're ball busting politicians, girly cupcake baking bloggers, or somewhere in the middle.
It seems like it's a never ending battle; as women we'll never please anyone...so we might as well please ourselves, huh? So keep on you cupcake bloggers, you kick ass front line military women, and you somewhere in the middle ladies going about your day to day business. You don't have to live up to anyone's standards and expectations than your own-that's what generations of women before us have fought for-the right to be ourselves-don't let small minded people take that away from you.
Friday, August 19, 2011
It's Not Fair
Gabe is in the "it's not fair" phase of his life (the first of many, I'm sure) Dr. Montessori made a point to mention (more than once, I might add) that when a child hits six or seven, they suddenly have a sense of justice, mostly pertaining to themselves, but eventually pertaining to other people and other situations as well. Once a day or so, Gabriel will tell me something isn't fair. Today it wasn't fair that he had to wear socks with his shoes, it also wasn't fair that he wasn't allowed to sit on his sister. While it's annoying to hear him whine "it's not faaaaair" twenty two thousand times a day about insignificant things, I know it's normal and he will eventually grow out it (at least for a little bit, I expect that around sixteen it will start up again, ha ha)
What I can't deal with is grown people continually lamenting about how unfair something is. We all have things in our lives that aren't particularly "fair" however, at some point you need to quit yer bitchin' as they say and DO something about it and if you chose to do nothing about whatever it is you think is so unfair, then shush your lips. Put up or shut up as they say :)
Here are a few things I've recently heard/seen/experienced people saying weren't "fair":
It's not fair that my spouse is working long hours, I never see them.
It's not fair that I have to be up all night with a new baby.
It's not fair that the neighbors have a new car and we make more money than them and don't have one.
It's not fair that I am not able to go on vacation when so-and-so was able to go.
Really people? REALLY? These things aren't fair? How about some examples of things that REALLY are not fair. It's not fair that 200 people were recently let go by our local Lowe's store with NO notice; it's not fair that a friend of mine is dealing with the reality of having a disabled son and has no real life support system to help her deal with it, it's not fair that some people have no vehicle at all and walk or bike everywhere like many people in our apartment complex do. It's not fair that young men and women are coming home in body bags because they're fighting overseas. It's not fair that small children are dying of cancer. Do you get my point?
There's a newish phrase to describe the pissing and moaning people do about trivial things; it's called "first world problems" and really, let's be realistic; if we're pissing and moaning that we can't get a NEW car or take a vacation, are we really THAT bad off? There are people right in your neighborhood who can't afford a SINGLE car let alone a new one, there are people in your neighborhood who would love a single DAY off of work but can't for fear of not having a job when they get back or losing that income.
To be fair, I'm guilty of complaining about stupid things too; I'm guilty of complaining that things aren't fair; in fact, one time I was complaining loudly to my mother about the fact that it's NOT FAIR that Gabe has a disability (and really, it's not...but bear with me here) My mom, who by the way is a cancer survivor, said "you know Chris, I used to feel that way about my cancer, I used to scream at God 'why me? why me? this isn't FAIR' and one day I just realized, 'why NOT me? SOMEONE has to make up the statistics' and yes, it sucks, but it's life and we deal with it. Yes it sucks that Gabe is disabled, however SOMEONE has to be that number and maybe you didn't plan it that way, but it is what it is and now you deal with it"
And that's kind of been my motto since that day. No it's not fair, but why NOT me? In all reality, our lives are GOOD. Even if we can't buy a second car right now; even if we can't go to the Dells for Labor Day, even if I do NOT see Geo much because of 60 hour work weeks. How can I, in good conscience, complain about these things when there are so many people who are so much worse off?
Geo's grandparents have a quote they shared with us that they love and we've come to love it as well:
"Contentment is not the fulfillment of what you want, but the realization of how much you already have." I'm finding that as time goes by, this is truer and truer. Be happy, be grateful, be CONTENT, you'll be much richer for it...and there's NOTHING unfair about that!
What I can't deal with is grown people continually lamenting about how unfair something is. We all have things in our lives that aren't particularly "fair" however, at some point you need to quit yer bitchin' as they say and DO something about it and if you chose to do nothing about whatever it is you think is so unfair, then shush your lips. Put up or shut up as they say :)
Here are a few things I've recently heard/seen/experienced people saying weren't "fair":
It's not fair that my spouse is working long hours, I never see them.
It's not fair that I have to be up all night with a new baby.
It's not fair that the neighbors have a new car and we make more money than them and don't have one.
It's not fair that I am not able to go on vacation when so-and-so was able to go.
Really people? REALLY? These things aren't fair? How about some examples of things that REALLY are not fair. It's not fair that 200 people were recently let go by our local Lowe's store with NO notice; it's not fair that a friend of mine is dealing with the reality of having a disabled son and has no real life support system to help her deal with it, it's not fair that some people have no vehicle at all and walk or bike everywhere like many people in our apartment complex do. It's not fair that young men and women are coming home in body bags because they're fighting overseas. It's not fair that small children are dying of cancer. Do you get my point?
There's a newish phrase to describe the pissing and moaning people do about trivial things; it's called "first world problems" and really, let's be realistic; if we're pissing and moaning that we can't get a NEW car or take a vacation, are we really THAT bad off? There are people right in your neighborhood who can't afford a SINGLE car let alone a new one, there are people in your neighborhood who would love a single DAY off of work but can't for fear of not having a job when they get back or losing that income.
To be fair, I'm guilty of complaining about stupid things too; I'm guilty of complaining that things aren't fair; in fact, one time I was complaining loudly to my mother about the fact that it's NOT FAIR that Gabe has a disability (and really, it's not...but bear with me here) My mom, who by the way is a cancer survivor, said "you know Chris, I used to feel that way about my cancer, I used to scream at God 'why me? why me? this isn't FAIR' and one day I just realized, 'why NOT me? SOMEONE has to make up the statistics' and yes, it sucks, but it's life and we deal with it. Yes it sucks that Gabe is disabled, however SOMEONE has to be that number and maybe you didn't plan it that way, but it is what it is and now you deal with it"
And that's kind of been my motto since that day. No it's not fair, but why NOT me? In all reality, our lives are GOOD. Even if we can't buy a second car right now; even if we can't go to the Dells for Labor Day, even if I do NOT see Geo much because of 60 hour work weeks. How can I, in good conscience, complain about these things when there are so many people who are so much worse off?
Geo's grandparents have a quote they shared with us that they love and we've come to love it as well:
"Contentment is not the fulfillment of what you want, but the realization of how much you already have." I'm finding that as time goes by, this is truer and truer. Be happy, be grateful, be CONTENT, you'll be much richer for it...and there's NOTHING unfair about that!
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
Weight Watchers: Week Four
I had originally planned to update every Tuesday about weight watchers and then decided that would be too boring; instead I'll do it once a month, which won't be nearly as annoying :P
Today was my one month weigh in; it's been 2 days shy of joining weight watchers and I'm pleased to say that I've lost 8.2 pounds and five inches! Not only that but I feel pretty damn good. I've got energy like crazy and my work outs have become much more productive. I'm more than halfway to my first goal (which makes me VERY happy) and once I hit the first goal, I'll be halfway to my SECOND goal-I like the way that works.
I've been tracking everything online at the weight watchers site; research says that people who use the online system lose more weight than those who do not use it and I can see why. You have numbers in front of you that are updated in real time; if you go over your points it doesn't yell at you or put your points in red, it just calmly adds them to your total. When you lose weight the system congratulates you, when you do not lose weight (or, gasp, gain) it doesn't chastise you, instead it encourages you to go back to your previous week and see what small changes you can make to ensure your next week is a better week-which I really like. It's hard to be upset with yourself for gaining (like I did two weeks ago-thanks to an amazing anniversary cake AND two drinks...whoops) when the system isn't "mad" either, know what I mean?
Anyway, to sum it up; I'm losing pounds and inches and I'm gaining energy and optimism! I feel great and feel like this is finally "it" for me. I finally get it and my body seems to have gotten the memo as well! Hooray!
Today was my one month weigh in; it's been 2 days shy of joining weight watchers and I'm pleased to say that I've lost 8.2 pounds and five inches! Not only that but I feel pretty damn good. I've got energy like crazy and my work outs have become much more productive. I'm more than halfway to my first goal (which makes me VERY happy) and once I hit the first goal, I'll be halfway to my SECOND goal-I like the way that works.
I've been tracking everything online at the weight watchers site; research says that people who use the online system lose more weight than those who do not use it and I can see why. You have numbers in front of you that are updated in real time; if you go over your points it doesn't yell at you or put your points in red, it just calmly adds them to your total. When you lose weight the system congratulates you, when you do not lose weight (or, gasp, gain) it doesn't chastise you, instead it encourages you to go back to your previous week and see what small changes you can make to ensure your next week is a better week-which I really like. It's hard to be upset with yourself for gaining (like I did two weeks ago-thanks to an amazing anniversary cake AND two drinks...whoops) when the system isn't "mad" either, know what I mean?
Anyway, to sum it up; I'm losing pounds and inches and I'm gaining energy and optimism! I feel great and feel like this is finally "it" for me. I finally get it and my body seems to have gotten the memo as well! Hooray!
Thursday, July 7, 2011
Momma Musings: I'm THAT Mom
Have you seen this link?
Basically the author talks about "curbing your brats" and other equally as obnoxious rants directed towards parents of unruly children. I agree with a lot of what he has to say but also see the other side of the story as well; I have two smallish children whom 95% of the time are really well behaved in public. We take them out to eat, we go to the movie theater, the train, etc etc and they behave well. It's important to us that they have manners and know how to behave in public (much like OUR parents thought the same thing)
Tonight, however, was one of the 5% nights.
It had been a long day; we were up fairly early, had errands to run and then had to leave to go the library so I could work for a couple of hours. The kids were wound up-they played with a friend out on the playground for over an hour, they had some decadent chocolate cake made by a patron of the library, and were really acting riled up. I made the mistake of going grocery shopping tonight after this long active day. The store, thankfully, was not busy. Gabe and Bits were excited to be in the store, they were being a bit silly, but nothing I was concerned with. They were using manners, they weren't screaming, they were actually being quite good...until we got to the pickle aisle.
*sigh* the pickle aisle. I am sure the pickle aisle is going to be an aisle that Bits avoids for a good long time after this evening.
Miss Bits was being silly, pointing to random things on the shelves saying "hey mom, do we need may-o-naise? what about a million pudding cups? AND PEANUT BUTTER?!" she and Gabe were having a good ole time pointing out silly things...until she saw a giant jar of pickles (we're talking the giant gallon size of pickles) rather than just POINT at them she picked them up (you see where this is going, right?) *sigh* She picked up the pickles (say that ten times fast lol) and the pickles, being heavy AND in a glass jar, started to slide out of her arms. I wasn't close enough to her that I could catch them and they fell and the glass shattered and the briny smell of pickles filled the air.
And then the tears started and the wide eyed stare of Gabe happened and I had to suppress a giggle (uh oh. did I really just admit that I thought it was kind of funny? yes, yes I did) Bits was so upset, I didn't have the heart to scold her. I asked if she was okay and she replied through sobs that she was "so so sorry momma, I'm so sorry momma" We got a wet floor sign and put it near the pickles and sought out an employee. Thankfully the aisle was empty-as was most of the store. I feel badly that someone had to pick those pickles up, but it was an accident; I'm not too proud to say that I've broken things in stores-it happens sometimes. I've always offered to pay for them, but people know that accidents happen-even when it's a silly kid acting silly-accidents are accidents.
Was she being intentionally naughty? Of course not. Will she EVER pick up a glass jar that's half her size again? Probably not. Were we part of the "brat" culture the articles' author was describing? Probably. Did Bits learn a lesson? Yes. Was anyone hurt? No. Am I a bad momma for this happening? I'd like to think not. The fact of the matter is that sometimes accidents happen and they can't be avoided...and the author of the previously mentioned article would be wise to NOT lump all parents together because of single incidents he's seen from children.
And now it's off to bed for the pickle princess' pooped parent!
Basically the author talks about "curbing your brats" and other equally as obnoxious rants directed towards parents of unruly children. I agree with a lot of what he has to say but also see the other side of the story as well; I have two smallish children whom 95% of the time are really well behaved in public. We take them out to eat, we go to the movie theater, the train, etc etc and they behave well. It's important to us that they have manners and know how to behave in public (much like OUR parents thought the same thing)
Tonight, however, was one of the 5% nights.
It had been a long day; we were up fairly early, had errands to run and then had to leave to go the library so I could work for a couple of hours. The kids were wound up-they played with a friend out on the playground for over an hour, they had some decadent chocolate cake made by a patron of the library, and were really acting riled up. I made the mistake of going grocery shopping tonight after this long active day. The store, thankfully, was not busy. Gabe and Bits were excited to be in the store, they were being a bit silly, but nothing I was concerned with. They were using manners, they weren't screaming, they were actually being quite good...until we got to the pickle aisle.
*sigh* the pickle aisle. I am sure the pickle aisle is going to be an aisle that Bits avoids for a good long time after this evening.
Miss Bits was being silly, pointing to random things on the shelves saying "hey mom, do we need may-o-naise? what about a million pudding cups? AND PEANUT BUTTER?!" she and Gabe were having a good ole time pointing out silly things...until she saw a giant jar of pickles (we're talking the giant gallon size of pickles) rather than just POINT at them she picked them up (you see where this is going, right?) *sigh* She picked up the pickles (say that ten times fast lol) and the pickles, being heavy AND in a glass jar, started to slide out of her arms. I wasn't close enough to her that I could catch them and they fell and the glass shattered and the briny smell of pickles filled the air.
And then the tears started and the wide eyed stare of Gabe happened and I had to suppress a giggle (uh oh. did I really just admit that I thought it was kind of funny? yes, yes I did) Bits was so upset, I didn't have the heart to scold her. I asked if she was okay and she replied through sobs that she was "so so sorry momma, I'm so sorry momma" We got a wet floor sign and put it near the pickles and sought out an employee. Thankfully the aisle was empty-as was most of the store. I feel badly that someone had to pick those pickles up, but it was an accident; I'm not too proud to say that I've broken things in stores-it happens sometimes. I've always offered to pay for them, but people know that accidents happen-even when it's a silly kid acting silly-accidents are accidents.
Was she being intentionally naughty? Of course not. Will she EVER pick up a glass jar that's half her size again? Probably not. Were we part of the "brat" culture the articles' author was describing? Probably. Did Bits learn a lesson? Yes. Was anyone hurt? No. Am I a bad momma for this happening? I'd like to think not. The fact of the matter is that sometimes accidents happen and they can't be avoided...and the author of the previously mentioned article would be wise to NOT lump all parents together because of single incidents he's seen from children.
And now it's off to bed for the pickle princess' pooped parent!
Friday, June 24, 2011
Now How in the H Do I Explain This One?
With the recent news (recent as in, a few hours ago at most) that New York just became the largest state to legalize gay marriage (Illinois legalized civil unions for EVERYONE earlier this year) the topic of people being gay and gays and lesbians marrying has been a topic in our house lately. Geo and I firmly believe that you should feel free to marry whomever you'd like; two people who are in love, regardless of gender, ought to be able to get married. It's not "gay people" ruining the sanctity of marriage, it's people who make a mockery of marriage (see: Britney Spears, Liz Taylor, etc etc) it's people who find it easier to get divorced than work through their problems, it's people who get married for the wrong reasons rather than for love and companionship.
Growing up I was really not exposed to gay people whatsoever, nor was George. It truly was a non issue in our families; however now that we're raising our children it IS an issue. We have gay friends, we've supported the idea of civil unions (and marriages) for EVERYONE since...well, forever. It's never NOT been a good idea in our minds. Personally, I don't think the gov't has any business being in my bedroom-or anyone else's for that matter.
ANYWAY, today at lunch, Bits said to me "Mom, is it okay for two boys to get married? What about two ladies?" I said "of course it is, honey, why wouldn't it be?" She thought about it for a minute and said "isn't it weird that they would kiss?" I asked, "Is it weird when mom and dad kiss?" Again, she thought about it for a minute and said "no, it's not" I gently explained that it doesn't matter if two boys, two girls, or a boy and a girl get married, as long as they love each other and care for one another. She said ok and went back to nibbling her lunch. Gabe and I have had this chat before; he made a point to tell me how "gross" it was that two men would kiss. When I asked why, he said "Because kissing is GROSS" I'm pretty sure he meant kissing in general, not boys kissing each other (ah the simplicity of a seven year old!)
I want to raise my children to know that no matter what, people should be free to love one another (isn't that a HUGE Christian value? LOVE ONE ANOTHER?) and they should be free to marry whomever they want regardless of gender, race, religion, etc. I know that a lot of people disagree with me (which is fine, I'm just thankful YOU aren't raising my children) and a lot of people would say I'm encouraging my children to be gay (ha ha, because you can "cause" someone to become gay...or not) but honestly, I just want them to be good people who see other people as PEOPLE, if that makes any sense. Labels are incredibly hard to shake and are, unfortunately, a big part of being a person, however, I'm hoping that by talking to my children, by exposing them to different people and different lifestyles (don't panic, we aren't going to Pride...at least not this year lol) that they won't look at someone and immediately pick out something they perceive as "different".
Gabriel, of course, IS different. He has a disability, he knows he has differences but doesn't want to be treated any differently than his classmates and peers-I honestly think because of HIS desire to be treated equally, he's not going to have any issue with this-likewise, Bits will be accepting and loving as well because of her brother. Parenting is a whole new ball game, I just hope that by the time Gabe and Bits have children, gay marriage will be a complete and utter non issue-everyone should be able to have the same rights that Geo and I have when it comes to insurance, power of attorney, child custody, etc. In my mind, giving partners these basic rights is simple...it shouldn't have to be a battle. Congrats again, to the state of New York and to all those who in 30 short days will be able to marry their partners!!
Growing up I was really not exposed to gay people whatsoever, nor was George. It truly was a non issue in our families; however now that we're raising our children it IS an issue. We have gay friends, we've supported the idea of civil unions (and marriages) for EVERYONE since...well, forever. It's never NOT been a good idea in our minds. Personally, I don't think the gov't has any business being in my bedroom-or anyone else's for that matter.
ANYWAY, today at lunch, Bits said to me "Mom, is it okay for two boys to get married? What about two ladies?" I said "of course it is, honey, why wouldn't it be?" She thought about it for a minute and said "isn't it weird that they would kiss?" I asked, "Is it weird when mom and dad kiss?" Again, she thought about it for a minute and said "no, it's not" I gently explained that it doesn't matter if two boys, two girls, or a boy and a girl get married, as long as they love each other and care for one another. She said ok and went back to nibbling her lunch. Gabe and I have had this chat before; he made a point to tell me how "gross" it was that two men would kiss. When I asked why, he said "Because kissing is GROSS" I'm pretty sure he meant kissing in general, not boys kissing each other (ah the simplicity of a seven year old!)
I want to raise my children to know that no matter what, people should be free to love one another (isn't that a HUGE Christian value? LOVE ONE ANOTHER?) and they should be free to marry whomever they want regardless of gender, race, religion, etc. I know that a lot of people disagree with me (which is fine, I'm just thankful YOU aren't raising my children) and a lot of people would say I'm encouraging my children to be gay (ha ha, because you can "cause" someone to become gay...or not) but honestly, I just want them to be good people who see other people as PEOPLE, if that makes any sense. Labels are incredibly hard to shake and are, unfortunately, a big part of being a person, however, I'm hoping that by talking to my children, by exposing them to different people and different lifestyles (don't panic, we aren't going to Pride...at least not this year lol) that they won't look at someone and immediately pick out something they perceive as "different".
Gabriel, of course, IS different. He has a disability, he knows he has differences but doesn't want to be treated any differently than his classmates and peers-I honestly think because of HIS desire to be treated equally, he's not going to have any issue with this-likewise, Bits will be accepting and loving as well because of her brother. Parenting is a whole new ball game, I just hope that by the time Gabe and Bits have children, gay marriage will be a complete and utter non issue-everyone should be able to have the same rights that Geo and I have when it comes to insurance, power of attorney, child custody, etc. In my mind, giving partners these basic rights is simple...it shouldn't have to be a battle. Congrats again, to the state of New York and to all those who in 30 short days will be able to marry their partners!!
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
End of Week One of Weight Watchers
I finished my first week of Weight Watchers today; had my "official" weigh in and.....I've lost three pounds this week! Woohoo!! More importantly though, I am feeling GOOD. I'm making good food choices and it's obviously working. Thank you for all the nice comments and emails I've received about the lifestyle change I'm making :) Here goes my next week!
Monday, June 6, 2011
Bits and Bots
A little bit of this, a little bit of that. I've got a few things on my mind but not enough for it to be separate blog posts...
*We had a good weekend; even if Geo worked the whole darn time. We went yard saling and I found the most amazing deal-I got a 4.5 qt cast iron dutch oven for three dollars! THREE DOLLARS!
Geo's relieved because now he doesn't have to buy me the god awful expensive one I've been begging for (seen here) though I would definitely not return it if it was given to me as a gift ha ha
*Today is Geo's grandparents Alice and Harvey's 58th wedding anniversary-the people in Geo's family stay married forever, which is pretty awesome if you ask me. Geo's dad and step mom just celebrated 22 years, his grandparents have 58 years today, his aunt and uncle are in the mid 20's his mom and step dad are celebrating 25 years later this month, and his grandparents Witkowski are celebrating 60 years later this year!! My own parents have been married 31 years as well...Geo and I are the babies in this family as far as marriage goes; we'll be celebrating ten years in July.
*I've been trying to stress to the kids that good things happen to good people; this weekend they saw it in action. Gabe has struggled to find friends since moving here-it's hard to move halfway through the school year. This weekend, however, a new family moved into our building and one of the family members is a cute little tow headed seven year old named T. He and Gabe have hit it off famously and they actually have a playdate set for later today (though they'll be playing video games rather than legos or something ha ha) I told him that after all these long months without a best buddy it seems that he's finally found one. He was incredibly happy and I have it on good authority that T was pretty darn happy too!
*SarahAnne asked me very seriously yesterday where robots lived; she was very concerned that they lived in our building. She's incredibly weird.
*Thursday Bits was very VERY cross with me (I don't remember why now, I probably wouldn't let her put lipstick on the cat or some such business) She walked up to me with her arms crossed in front of her and said "That's it, I'm not living with you ANYMORE! I'm going to go live with *pause* a family of *longer pause* squirrels who will treat me nicer" Then she lost it laughing. Apparently the thought of living with squirrels was funnier than remembering how cross she was with me.
*School ends on Wednesday, however we'll be just as busy for the next two weeks-Bits starts dance camp this afternoon with Grandma Dyan and next week GABE has dance camp with Grandma. Gabe is quite cross that he isn't doing soccer camp first, but I haven't been able to find a summer soccer league yet-I'm looking kid, I'm looking!
and on that note, hope you had a lovely weekend and have a great week!
*We had a good weekend; even if Geo worked the whole darn time. We went yard saling and I found the most amazing deal-I got a 4.5 qt cast iron dutch oven for three dollars! THREE DOLLARS!
Geo's relieved because now he doesn't have to buy me the god awful expensive one I've been begging for (seen here) though I would definitely not return it if it was given to me as a gift ha ha
*Today is Geo's grandparents Alice and Harvey's 58th wedding anniversary-the people in Geo's family stay married forever, which is pretty awesome if you ask me. Geo's dad and step mom just celebrated 22 years, his grandparents have 58 years today, his aunt and uncle are in the mid 20's his mom and step dad are celebrating 25 years later this month, and his grandparents Witkowski are celebrating 60 years later this year!! My own parents have been married 31 years as well...Geo and I are the babies in this family as far as marriage goes; we'll be celebrating ten years in July.
*I've been trying to stress to the kids that good things happen to good people; this weekend they saw it in action. Gabe has struggled to find friends since moving here-it's hard to move halfway through the school year. This weekend, however, a new family moved into our building and one of the family members is a cute little tow headed seven year old named T. He and Gabe have hit it off famously and they actually have a playdate set for later today (though they'll be playing video games rather than legos or something ha ha) I told him that after all these long months without a best buddy it seems that he's finally found one. He was incredibly happy and I have it on good authority that T was pretty darn happy too!
*SarahAnne asked me very seriously yesterday where robots lived; she was very concerned that they lived in our building. She's incredibly weird.
*Thursday Bits was very VERY cross with me (I don't remember why now, I probably wouldn't let her put lipstick on the cat or some such business) She walked up to me with her arms crossed in front of her and said "That's it, I'm not living with you ANYMORE! I'm going to go live with *pause* a family of *longer pause* squirrels who will treat me nicer" Then she lost it laughing. Apparently the thought of living with squirrels was funnier than remembering how cross she was with me.
*School ends on Wednesday, however we'll be just as busy for the next two weeks-Bits starts dance camp this afternoon with Grandma Dyan and next week GABE has dance camp with Grandma. Gabe is quite cross that he isn't doing soccer camp first, but I haven't been able to find a summer soccer league yet-I'm looking kid, I'm looking!
and on that note, hope you had a lovely weekend and have a great week!
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
In Which Momma Does Not Make New Friends
Yesterday was gloriously beautiful out, so Bitsy and I walked down to the local park to see if we could find some new friends and run off some energy. Things were going really well for a while; I talked to the momma of a little girl who came to play in the rocket ship dressed in a NASA suit only to find out that they were in the area visiting a friend and don't live near by-dang it. I figured anyone who would not only buy their kid an astronaut suit but had the sense of humor to LET their kid wear it to the park was probably the kind of lady I'd want to hang out with. Boo.
So we went over to the swings where there was one nanny (younger than my sister, not my demographic lol) and two very very very busy mommas. You know the type; all they talk about is how busy busy busy they are. They are so busy that they just never have time for themselves and yearn for the days when they'll be able to leisurely lounge at the park like the OTHER mothers they say sneeringly as they gaze in disgust at the mothers who dare sit down while their children are playing. (that would be me, whoops)
So we're at the swings and Bitsy is swinging happily. VERY happily. Screaming at the top of her lungs "HIGHER MOMMA HIGHER!" So, being the mom I am, I indulge her and push her higher. Higher than I've ever pushed her (do you see where this is going yet??) She's flying toward the moon and being the modern mother I am, I am texting while she swings....and all of the sudden she lets go of the swing on one side...and flies off. It was fantastic. I mean, absolutely, amazing. I watched it all in slow motion as I threw my phone and ran toward her screaming "ooooooohhhhhhhhhh ssssssshhhhhhhhiiiiiiiiittttttt" (that's oh shit for those who don't read in slow motion)
She flipped sideways and did an awesome somersault; she landed about ten feet from the swing set and was covered in mulch. I picked her up and brushed her off and she was fine; she just wanted to go back on the swing, but this time she promised to hold on. I said alright and set her back on the swing. The nanny of the girl next to me said "wow, that was crazy" and I agreed and then started to laugh because, seriously, it was hilarious and she wasn't hurt, plus I have a tendency to laugh in the face of things like this because I often react inappropriately, particularly when in public.
So now in addition to being that mom who isn't busy (lol ok) I am also the mother who swears, loudly, in front of children...and then, as if that wasn't enough, after swinging, Bits decided to walk over to the jungle gym and smacked headfirst into a bar. She staggered around as I ran to her and said to me "that's it, I'm leaving" as I started to giggle again. She had a humdinger of a headache and some scratches on her leg and arm as we left the park yesterday. I am not sure that we'll be going back again...unless it's midnight or pouring rain or something equally as obnoxious. I fully expect to find a picture of myself on a poster at the park that says "do not engage this woman, she swears in front of children and laughs inappropriately"
WHOOPS.
(Side note: after some motrin and some lunch (per the doctors' suggestion) , Bitsy was back to normal and rarin' to go back to the park...)
So we went over to the swings where there was one nanny (younger than my sister, not my demographic lol) and two very very very busy mommas. You know the type; all they talk about is how busy busy busy they are. They are so busy that they just never have time for themselves and yearn for the days when they'll be able to leisurely lounge at the park like the OTHER mothers they say sneeringly as they gaze in disgust at the mothers who dare sit down while their children are playing. (that would be me, whoops)
So we're at the swings and Bitsy is swinging happily. VERY happily. Screaming at the top of her lungs "HIGHER MOMMA HIGHER!" So, being the mom I am, I indulge her and push her higher. Higher than I've ever pushed her (do you see where this is going yet??) She's flying toward the moon and being the modern mother I am, I am texting while she swings....and all of the sudden she lets go of the swing on one side...and flies off. It was fantastic. I mean, absolutely, amazing. I watched it all in slow motion as I threw my phone and ran toward her screaming "ooooooohhhhhhhhhh ssssssshhhhhhhhiiiiiiiiittttttt" (that's oh shit for those who don't read in slow motion)
She flipped sideways and did an awesome somersault; she landed about ten feet from the swing set and was covered in mulch. I picked her up and brushed her off and she was fine; she just wanted to go back on the swing, but this time she promised to hold on. I said alright and set her back on the swing. The nanny of the girl next to me said "wow, that was crazy" and I agreed and then started to laugh because, seriously, it was hilarious and she wasn't hurt, plus I have a tendency to laugh in the face of things like this because I often react inappropriately, particularly when in public.
So now in addition to being that mom who isn't busy (lol ok) I am also the mother who swears, loudly, in front of children...and then, as if that wasn't enough, after swinging, Bits decided to walk over to the jungle gym and smacked headfirst into a bar. She staggered around as I ran to her and said to me "that's it, I'm leaving" as I started to giggle again. She had a humdinger of a headache and some scratches on her leg and arm as we left the park yesterday. I am not sure that we'll be going back again...unless it's midnight or pouring rain or something equally as obnoxious. I fully expect to find a picture of myself on a poster at the park that says "do not engage this woman, she swears in front of children and laughs inappropriately"
WHOOPS.
(Side note: after some motrin and some lunch (per the doctors' suggestion) , Bitsy was back to normal and rarin' to go back to the park...)
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
Momma Musings: Childrens' Diet...
and how parents affect what a child eats...
Last night we went to Gabriel's final school concert; it's the first time I've ever gotten a good look at the school population and I've got to say, I'm disgusted. A good 75% of the children that I saw were overweight or obese; there was a boy in front of us who was still in elementary school who had broader shoulders than me and was sweating the whole time he sat in front of us. I could hear him wheezing, it was awful. There were a lot of children in the program who were SO big I had a hard time believing they were only 7 or 8.
I'm not one to point fingers and place blame BUT where the hell are the parents while these kids are getting so fat? I'm a fat adult; I've made my own choices and have no one to be upset with except myself. *I* am responsible for my own body, no one else. I'm not fat because of advertising from fast food places, I'm not fat from food additives, HFCS didn't make me fat; I did it to myself by making poor food choices and not being as active as I should have been.
I recently read a stat somewhere (here, actually) that said 40% of McDonald's sales are from Happy Meals. FORTY PERCENT.
Now, just for a second, think about that. People are blaming McDonald s for making their children fat...most children don't have jobs and I don't know of any child being allowed to go to McDonald's by themselves, so who is buying the happy meals? To be sure, you can get "healthier" options when you get a happy meal; a plain hamburger, apples, and skim milk aren't THAT bad...but really, who wants that when you can have nuggets, fries, and chocolate milk??
Going even further back, let's talk about a mothers' responsibility for her childs' diet (no offense men, but you can't feed a fetus...haha) even while in utero. Numerous studies are coming out pointing more and more to children being predisposed to obesity and poor food choices because of how they were "nourished" in the womb.
Rather than keep going on and on and beating this dead horse, I'd like to urge parents to be more conscientious of how they are affecting their children when it comes to food. Here are some more links to articles and helpful hints when it comes to helping your child become the best they can be:
Great Article on mom's and grandma's(!!) affecting a childs' diet
Healthy eating tips for kiddos
Health benefits of a healthy diet for children
Helping an overweight child stay healthy
Easy ways to keep your kiddos active this summer
Last night we went to Gabriel's final school concert; it's the first time I've ever gotten a good look at the school population and I've got to say, I'm disgusted. A good 75% of the children that I saw were overweight or obese; there was a boy in front of us who was still in elementary school who had broader shoulders than me and was sweating the whole time he sat in front of us. I could hear him wheezing, it was awful. There were a lot of children in the program who were SO big I had a hard time believing they were only 7 or 8.
I'm not one to point fingers and place blame BUT where the hell are the parents while these kids are getting so fat? I'm a fat adult; I've made my own choices and have no one to be upset with except myself. *I* am responsible for my own body, no one else. I'm not fat because of advertising from fast food places, I'm not fat from food additives, HFCS didn't make me fat; I did it to myself by making poor food choices and not being as active as I should have been.
I recently read a stat somewhere (here, actually) that said 40% of McDonald's sales are from Happy Meals. FORTY PERCENT.
Now, just for a second, think about that. People are blaming McDonald s for making their children fat...most children don't have jobs and I don't know of any child being allowed to go to McDonald's by themselves, so who is buying the happy meals? To be sure, you can get "healthier" options when you get a happy meal; a plain hamburger, apples, and skim milk aren't THAT bad...but really, who wants that when you can have nuggets, fries, and chocolate milk??
Going even further back, let's talk about a mothers' responsibility for her childs' diet (no offense men, but you can't feed a fetus...haha) even while in utero. Numerous studies are coming out pointing more and more to children being predisposed to obesity and poor food choices because of how they were "nourished" in the womb.
Rather than keep going on and on and beating this dead horse, I'd like to urge parents to be more conscientious of how they are affecting their children when it comes to food. Here are some more links to articles and helpful hints when it comes to helping your child become the best they can be:
Great Article on mom's and grandma's(!!) affecting a childs' diet
Healthy eating tips for kiddos
Health benefits of a healthy diet for children
Helping an overweight child stay healthy
Easy ways to keep your kiddos active this summer
Saturday, May 21, 2011
Momma Musings: Religion and Hypocrisy
So, you oldie moldies know that I'm not particularly religious; I was raised in a great little Baptist church with really good pastors, I was married by a wonderful pastor whom to this day I admire a great deal. My kids are baptized and we occasionally go to church. Neither Geo nor I feel that going to church is an essential part of being a good person, nor part of being a "Christian". I can't say that I really identify as a Christian, I like to say that I'm "christianish" because while I agree with a lot of things the bible says, I can also see the merit and beauty in other religions and what they believe; for example I think Buddhism and Hinduism are both amazing religions-very peaceful religions, very calming and centering, if you will.
Now, that all being said, as most of you know, some guy decided that today was the "rapture" The rapture, of course being the day that Christ comes back and takes the believers to heaven and the rest of the people sit and perish in hell on Earth. *shakes head* Okay, so that's what the bible says will happen, fine, whatever. I don't believe it, I don't think it's actually going to happen that way, but that's just me. Lots of people have lots of beliefs that I don't and that's ok...because I have beliefs that others don't have as well. No worries, we can get along no matter WHAT the other one believes. (unless you believe that Bob Dylan is a god on earth, then we'll disagree and I'll have to send you packing ha ha)
So there's this whole "OMG RAPTURE" thing going on and all these religious types and people who think they are religious types professing their love for Jesus and telling the non believers that they're going to be in hell on earth-oh ha ha ha-because they don't believe in Jesus. The same people who are professing their love for Jesus are also the ones who are the most hypocritical, in my opinion. The ones saying they love Jesus are the ones who don't love their own families, the ones not honoring their own mothers and fathers, the ones getting rip roaring drunk, beating their wives, and showing up at church Sunday as pious as all get out. The "godly" ones are the ones least likely be living a Godly life. They're concerned with material possessions, they're concerned with money, they're concerned with no one but themselves...and yet they're the Godly ones? They're the ones God is going to spirit away to heaven? Oh please. Quit deluding yourselves "christians"; you're no better than the rest of us, except that the rest of us don't hide behind religion to justify the things you do (need an example of what part of religion people use to justify their actions: Hating gay people. The bible says being gay is a sin; the bible also says to hate the sin, but love the sinner...I'm afraid that I see way more hate toward actual gay people than I do toward the "sin". I can go on and on, but I won't, I think you get the point)
NOW that I've said that, let me also say this, I know quite a few GOOD Christians; I know people who truly embody what it means to be a good Christian person. People who love their neighbors as themselves, people who value humanity in all forms: color, creed, sexual orientation not being an issue. We're lucky that we have these people in our lives because they really show us what a Christian is supposed to look like-none of Geo's grandparents are religious nuts; they're Christians who practice what they preach-love and respect for their fellow man, fearing God, praising God, and honoring God in all they say and do.
Maybe being a "good" christian comes with age? Maybe as these radical hypocritical "christians" grow up, they'll realize that all their hate in the name of "God" is wrong, maybe they'll realize that material possessions really are NOT what we're meant to have (after all, you can't take it with you and if you're Christian, your treasure lies in heaven, right?) Maybe they'll realize that loving your family, honoring your parents (and parents in law...) is actually what brings honor to God.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I've been working on my post-rapture looting list* for a few days and need to finish it-I only have a few short hours before the rapture begins and I need to be prepared...
*of course, I'm kidding, I rarely take anything like this seriously, especially when it's something so obviously made up by some whack job who predicted the same thing was going to happen in 1994...
Now, that all being said, as most of you know, some guy decided that today was the "rapture" The rapture, of course being the day that Christ comes back and takes the believers to heaven and the rest of the people sit and perish in hell on Earth. *shakes head* Okay, so that's what the bible says will happen, fine, whatever. I don't believe it, I don't think it's actually going to happen that way, but that's just me. Lots of people have lots of beliefs that I don't and that's ok...because I have beliefs that others don't have as well. No worries, we can get along no matter WHAT the other one believes. (unless you believe that Bob Dylan is a god on earth, then we'll disagree and I'll have to send you packing ha ha)
So there's this whole "OMG RAPTURE" thing going on and all these religious types and people who think they are religious types professing their love for Jesus and telling the non believers that they're going to be in hell on earth-oh ha ha ha-because they don't believe in Jesus. The same people who are professing their love for Jesus are also the ones who are the most hypocritical, in my opinion. The ones saying they love Jesus are the ones who don't love their own families, the ones not honoring their own mothers and fathers, the ones getting rip roaring drunk, beating their wives, and showing up at church Sunday as pious as all get out. The "godly" ones are the ones least likely be living a Godly life. They're concerned with material possessions, they're concerned with money, they're concerned with no one but themselves...and yet they're the Godly ones? They're the ones God is going to spirit away to heaven? Oh please. Quit deluding yourselves "christians"; you're no better than the rest of us, except that the rest of us don't hide behind religion to justify the things you do (need an example of what part of religion people use to justify their actions: Hating gay people. The bible says being gay is a sin; the bible also says to hate the sin, but love the sinner...I'm afraid that I see way more hate toward actual gay people than I do toward the "sin". I can go on and on, but I won't, I think you get the point)
NOW that I've said that, let me also say this, I know quite a few GOOD Christians; I know people who truly embody what it means to be a good Christian person. People who love their neighbors as themselves, people who value humanity in all forms: color, creed, sexual orientation not being an issue. We're lucky that we have these people in our lives because they really show us what a Christian is supposed to look like-none of Geo's grandparents are religious nuts; they're Christians who practice what they preach-love and respect for their fellow man, fearing God, praising God, and honoring God in all they say and do.
Maybe being a "good" christian comes with age? Maybe as these radical hypocritical "christians" grow up, they'll realize that all their hate in the name of "God" is wrong, maybe they'll realize that material possessions really are NOT what we're meant to have (after all, you can't take it with you and if you're Christian, your treasure lies in heaven, right?) Maybe they'll realize that loving your family, honoring your parents (and parents in law...) is actually what brings honor to God.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I've been working on my post-rapture looting list* for a few days and need to finish it-I only have a few short hours before the rapture begins and I need to be prepared...
*of course, I'm kidding, I rarely take anything like this seriously, especially when it's something so obviously made up by some whack job who predicted the same thing was going to happen in 1994...
Monday, May 16, 2011
The Dreaded "D" Word
My dreaded "d" word is depression; many of you don't know this (but you will soon) but I've been clinically depressed for most of my adult life; I've sought treatment on and off for the last ten years or so, but have finally come to the realization that being medicated keeps me at an even keel and I've been on a low dose of antidepressants for about a year now.
A lot of people say "but you don't ACT depressed" and "you're so HAPPY, how can you be depressed?"
Here's the thing; depression doesn't just mean people aren't "happy". I'm plenty happy; I have two amazing kids, a great hunky hubby and an awesome support system around me. I'd say I'm happier than most people I know but that doesn't mean I am not depressed.
Depression hits me physically; I am in pain a lot. I am hypersensitive to most touching which sucks when all your little ones want to do is climb all over you and smooch and snuggle. Most days I struggle to have energy to do day to day tasks; I force myself to do it because I have to, but given the choice, I'd probably just lay around and not do a damn thing for 99% of the day. I have issues with motivation; I have things I want to do, but can't get them started, or get started and get very discouraged. As with the activities that require my attention and energy, I force myself to get motivated and do things or they wouldn't get done. I'm not "sad" so much as I am angry and negative. I tend to fixate on things that piss me off and they affect my mood; I get angry, irrationally so, many times, about stupid things or comments made that shouldn't bother me.
It's hard for me to talk about this because of the stigma attached to the word depression; as a general rule when people hear "depression" they think of people laying in bed wanting to die because their lives suck so badly. A lot of people assume that depression is all in your "head" and you just need to get over it/deal with it. People don't understand that depression takes a physical toll on you, they don't realize just how hard it can be to do the day to day activities that one needs to do to keep up an appearance of being "normal" I hope by writing this, someone will read and realize they are not alone and seek the help they need. It's humbling to "need" help, but a chat with a doctor can help immensely. I have done talk therapy and it did nothing for me, it takes an antidepressant to get my chemicals in balance and I'm okay with that. For a long time I was not okay with it and I, along with the people around me, suffered because of my own pride. If you're on the fence about seeking some help with your depression, take it from me, it's worth swallowing your pride to be able to get back to "normal" and life life to its' fullest the best way you can. If you can't do it for yourself, then do it for your family...your pet...your job. Whatever it takes to motivate you to get healthy; mental health is just as important, if not more so, than physical health.
Some resources for help with depression:
Signs and Symptoms of Depression
The Difference Between Post Partum Depression and Regular Depression
Depression in Men (yes, it's different than what women experience!!)
Children and Depression
Self Help Tips for Dealing with Depression
Hope Line-Suicide Prevention Hotline
A lot of people say "but you don't ACT depressed" and "you're so HAPPY, how can you be depressed?"
Here's the thing; depression doesn't just mean people aren't "happy". I'm plenty happy; I have two amazing kids, a great hunky hubby and an awesome support system around me. I'd say I'm happier than most people I know but that doesn't mean I am not depressed.
Depression hits me physically; I am in pain a lot. I am hypersensitive to most touching which sucks when all your little ones want to do is climb all over you and smooch and snuggle. Most days I struggle to have energy to do day to day tasks; I force myself to do it because I have to, but given the choice, I'd probably just lay around and not do a damn thing for 99% of the day. I have issues with motivation; I have things I want to do, but can't get them started, or get started and get very discouraged. As with the activities that require my attention and energy, I force myself to get motivated and do things or they wouldn't get done. I'm not "sad" so much as I am angry and negative. I tend to fixate on things that piss me off and they affect my mood; I get angry, irrationally so, many times, about stupid things or comments made that shouldn't bother me.
It's hard for me to talk about this because of the stigma attached to the word depression; as a general rule when people hear "depression" they think of people laying in bed wanting to die because their lives suck so badly. A lot of people assume that depression is all in your "head" and you just need to get over it/deal with it. People don't understand that depression takes a physical toll on you, they don't realize just how hard it can be to do the day to day activities that one needs to do to keep up an appearance of being "normal" I hope by writing this, someone will read and realize they are not alone and seek the help they need. It's humbling to "need" help, but a chat with a doctor can help immensely. I have done talk therapy and it did nothing for me, it takes an antidepressant to get my chemicals in balance and I'm okay with that. For a long time I was not okay with it and I, along with the people around me, suffered because of my own pride. If you're on the fence about seeking some help with your depression, take it from me, it's worth swallowing your pride to be able to get back to "normal" and life life to its' fullest the best way you can. If you can't do it for yourself, then do it for your family...your pet...your job. Whatever it takes to motivate you to get healthy; mental health is just as important, if not more so, than physical health.
Some resources for help with depression:
Signs and Symptoms of Depression
The Difference Between Post Partum Depression and Regular Depression
Depression in Men (yes, it's different than what women experience!!)
Children and Depression
Self Help Tips for Dealing with Depression
Hope Line-Suicide Prevention Hotline
Saturday, May 14, 2011
In laws
As promised in last weeks' Friday (twenty)Five, a post on in laws...
When you get married, the old adage says, you marry your spouse’s family. Whether you agree or not, it’s true. When I married George I got his whole big, complicated, complex, and AWESOME family. He has a mom, a dad, a step mom, a step dad, grandparents, step grandparents, uncles, aunts, cousins. The whole bit. There are a lot of them and whether I wanted to or not, I got this family when I married Geo.
It was a hard adjustment at first; growing up you’re very family centric to your OWN family. You have your parents, siblings, etc, it’s a tough concept to wrap your head around. Wait a minute, you mean now I’ve got IN LAWS, what in the hell does that mean?
To me, in laws are just more family. I love a big family gathering, we don’t need to be blood to have fun and enjoy ourselves and the longer I’m married the more I realize that by actually TRYING to love these people and integrating my life with my husband’s familys’ life, OUR married life is much richer.
I’m not really religious, I don’t think the Bible is the be all and end all, however I do think it has some good points and some great words of wisdom. One of the things the bible says is to “honor thy mother and father”; when you’re married, if you say “traditional” vows, you vow to “honor your spouse” I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately; the concept of not only honoring PARENTS but George. If we are to honor our parents and honor our spouse, doesn’t it only make sense to honor our SPOUSES’ parents? Shouldn’t we treat our in laws the same way we treat OUR parents? The answer, at least for me, is yes.
I’m not saying I’m perfect; I’m not saying this has been an easy concept for me. I have struggled mightily sometimes with being part of a huge in law family (and really, it’s TWO in law families because both of Geo’s parents are remarried) HOWEVER I’ve made a conscious decision that I will honor my (in law) parents as much as I honor my parents and as much as I honor Geo, if for no other reason than I expect him to do the same in return.
So…my question (always rhetorical, of course) for all of you is…are you honoring your in laws like you honor your own parents? Are you honoring your spouse the way they deserve to be honored? Are YOU being honored the way you deserve to be honored? What can you be doing in your daily life TO honor those around you?
When you get married, the old adage says, you marry your spouse’s family. Whether you agree or not, it’s true. When I married George I got his whole big, complicated, complex, and AWESOME family. He has a mom, a dad, a step mom, a step dad, grandparents, step grandparents, uncles, aunts, cousins. The whole bit. There are a lot of them and whether I wanted to or not, I got this family when I married Geo.
It was a hard adjustment at first; growing up you’re very family centric to your OWN family. You have your parents, siblings, etc, it’s a tough concept to wrap your head around. Wait a minute, you mean now I’ve got IN LAWS, what in the hell does that mean?
To me, in laws are just more family. I love a big family gathering, we don’t need to be blood to have fun and enjoy ourselves and the longer I’m married the more I realize that by actually TRYING to love these people and integrating my life with my husband’s familys’ life, OUR married life is much richer.
I’m not really religious, I don’t think the Bible is the be all and end all, however I do think it has some good points and some great words of wisdom. One of the things the bible says is to “honor thy mother and father”; when you’re married, if you say “traditional” vows, you vow to “honor your spouse” I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately; the concept of not only honoring PARENTS but George. If we are to honor our parents and honor our spouse, doesn’t it only make sense to honor our SPOUSES’ parents? Shouldn’t we treat our in laws the same way we treat OUR parents? The answer, at least for me, is yes.
I’m not saying I’m perfect; I’m not saying this has been an easy concept for me. I have struggled mightily sometimes with being part of a huge in law family (and really, it’s TWO in law families because both of Geo’s parents are remarried) HOWEVER I’ve made a conscious decision that I will honor my (in law) parents as much as I honor my parents and as much as I honor Geo, if for no other reason than I expect him to do the same in return.
So…my question (always rhetorical, of course) for all of you is…are you honoring your in laws like you honor your own parents? Are you honoring your spouse the way they deserve to be honored? Are YOU being honored the way you deserve to be honored? What can you be doing in your daily life TO honor those around you?
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
Wordy Wednesday: Word Power
Today's Wordless Wednesday is different in two ways: one, I'm posting it on Tuesday night and two, it's all about words.
I love playing with words; I love writing words, saying words, and using large descriptive words when a short one would suffice. I like saying things like:
"The word alliteration is alliterative"
I also like to say colloquial phrases such as "ass over teakettle", "take that jig jog" and "rule of thumb" I like to know the meaning of those phrases too--and if you want to know the meaning of phrases like that go to this site-thanks DIL!
Sometimes I like to
write in haiku form just 'cuz
it's super fun.
I like the way certain words feel in my mouth for example: "facetious","patronizing" and "onomatopoeia"
More than any of these things though, I love that both of my kids like to play with words. I love hearing Gabe sounding out words and then saying outloud to himself "what does that mean? am I saying that correctly?" I love when he asks the meaning of a word and then later on I hear him working that word into a sentence or two. I like when Bitsy hears me say something and repeats it, such as "You're making me very cross" or "can you turn that [radio] up a tick?"
Tonight she and I had the following conversation...
Mom: What are you doing in there? [there being the bathroom]
Bits: I'm just using the potty.
Mom: Ok, but go right back to bed when you're done. [major wishful thinking on my part. HA]
Bits: Okay Momma. I mean, MUDDER. [the "th" diphthong escapes her sometimes]
Words are simply delicious (isn't the word delicious delicious? Don't you just want to eat it? Much like the words scrumptious, delectable, and edible just sound like you could eat them)
Not only are both of the kiddos learning words to describe things and the world around them, they're learning that words have meaning. They're learning that some words give are "warm fuzzies" and others are "cold pricklies" I love when kids get to that age when they hear a word and don't quite know what it means but know that it gets a reaction out of you-I'm not just talking about swear words (though we ALL know that SarahAnne has a mouth like a sailor and I am pretty sure at this point it's not about getting a reaction, it's more that she wants to speak as colorfully aloud as she thinks-case in point: we were having a particularly tasty meal and with a mouth full of said tasty food, she sighed and said "oh momma, this is so damn delicious" and then gave another satisfied sigh. I can't fault her for saying it-though we did tell her we don't say those sorts of things at the table-because sometimes when I eat something *I* want to yell "THIS IS SO DAMN DELICIOUS")
Words like "like" "love" "dislike" and "hate" are words we are currently working on at home. We're working on other words that evoke emotions, such as "heart broken" and "ecstatic". Bits and Gabe have learned that using the word hate is strictly forbidden in our house-we simply do NOT use that word. Nor are we allowed to say that we don't love one another. As we explain it to the kids, we always love one another, even when we don't LIKE each other. It's okay not to like something that someone said or did BUT we still love them and treat them like we love them.
My hope is that Gabe and SarahAnne will grow up to love words the way I do-that before saying things they'll think about the meaning of the words they are about to say-and that in an excited moment, they won't lose the spelling bee because they spell the word "antler" incorrectly. (*sigh* the truth comes out; I once lost a spelling bee because I was completely and utterly overly self confident in my own abilities to whip everyone's asses at spelling. I started to spell antler, a rather simple word, and skipped over the letter "l" how embarrassing, to say the least!)
and just so this post has one wordless aspect to it...
I love playing with words; I love writing words, saying words, and using large descriptive words when a short one would suffice. I like saying things like:
and
"The word palindrome is not actually a palindrome"
and
"A pronoun is a noun that's lost its' amateur status"
I also like to say colloquial phrases such as "ass over teakettle", "take that jig jog" and "rule of thumb" I like to know the meaning of those phrases too--and if you want to know the meaning of phrases like that go to this site-thanks DIL!
Sometimes I like to
write in haiku form just 'cuz
it's super fun.
I like the way certain words feel in my mouth for example: "facetious","patronizing" and "onomatopoeia"
More than any of these things though, I love that both of my kids like to play with words. I love hearing Gabe sounding out words and then saying outloud to himself "what does that mean? am I saying that correctly?" I love when he asks the meaning of a word and then later on I hear him working that word into a sentence or two. I like when Bitsy hears me say something and repeats it, such as "You're making me very cross" or "can you turn that [radio] up a tick?"
Tonight she and I had the following conversation...
Mom: What are you doing in there? [there being the bathroom]
Bits: I'm just using the potty.
Mom: Ok, but go right back to bed when you're done. [major wishful thinking on my part. HA]
Bits: Okay Momma. I mean, MUDDER. [the "th" diphthong escapes her sometimes]
Words are simply delicious (isn't the word delicious delicious? Don't you just want to eat it? Much like the words scrumptious, delectable, and edible just sound like you could eat them)
Not only are both of the kiddos learning words to describe things and the world around them, they're learning that words have meaning. They're learning that some words give are "warm fuzzies" and others are "cold pricklies" I love when kids get to that age when they hear a word and don't quite know what it means but know that it gets a reaction out of you-I'm not just talking about swear words (though we ALL know that SarahAnne has a mouth like a sailor and I am pretty sure at this point it's not about getting a reaction, it's more that she wants to speak as colorfully aloud as she thinks-case in point: we were having a particularly tasty meal and with a mouth full of said tasty food, she sighed and said "oh momma, this is so damn delicious" and then gave another satisfied sigh. I can't fault her for saying it-though we did tell her we don't say those sorts of things at the table-because sometimes when I eat something *I* want to yell "THIS IS SO DAMN DELICIOUS")
Words like "like" "love" "dislike" and "hate" are words we are currently working on at home. We're working on other words that evoke emotions, such as "heart broken" and "ecstatic". Bits and Gabe have learned that using the word hate is strictly forbidden in our house-we simply do NOT use that word. Nor are we allowed to say that we don't love one another. As we explain it to the kids, we always love one another, even when we don't LIKE each other. It's okay not to like something that someone said or did BUT we still love them and treat them like we love them.
My hope is that Gabe and SarahAnne will grow up to love words the way I do-that before saying things they'll think about the meaning of the words they are about to say-and that in an excited moment, they won't lose the spelling bee because they spell the word "antler" incorrectly. (*sigh* the truth comes out; I once lost a spelling bee because I was completely and utterly overly self confident in my own abilities to whip everyone's asses at spelling. I started to spell antler, a rather simple word, and skipped over the letter "l" how embarrassing, to say the least!)
and just so this post has one wordless aspect to it...
Sunday, April 10, 2011
Politics and Religion
Two things you're never supposed to talk about with someone--politics and religion. I, however, love a good debate and love to hear other people's opinions. I am not so hard headed that I cannot listen to someone else's view and appreciate their beliefs. Earlier this week, the gov't nearly went into shut down over the budget; one of the biggest issues was funding for Planned Parenthood. Those of you who do not know, I am strong advocate of Planned Parenthood; a lot of people see the words "Planned Parenthood" and immediately think of abortion, but in reality, Only 3% of their services are abortion-in fact a lot of pp's don't even provide abortion services-they send you else where.
In a passionate fit, I posted a few things on facebook about our congresspeople working for us and how to contact them, I also posted that religion has no place in government because of one of the main principles this country was founded on; separation of church and state. For the record, I'm "Christian-ish" I believe in God, I think the bible is a decent book to guide your life on and I believe that above all, we ought to love one another and treat each other the way we want to be treated.
Imagine my shock when I opened up my email last night to find a "welcome" email from the Christian Coalition. Someone apparently thought I needed a good dose of Jesus in my life. Not only did they sign me up, the also created an account for me-one that I cannot log into because I don't have the password, so until I can get a hold of someone at the CC and prove to them that it was not ME signing up, I'm stuck getting these damn emails (well, in my spam folder anyway, ha ha) I really cannot imagine what would possess someone to sign me up for something like this-I mean, honest to God, I'm happy to listen to your views if you want to talk to me about them. I have great respect for other peoples' religious beliefs even if I don't necessarily agree with them.
Of course, I'm not TOO surprised by the fact that I've started receiving these sorts of emails again; after all during election season when I made it clear that I was a full supporter of Barack Obama I received many many MANY emails from the McCain campaign, the right to life campaign, Sarah Palin's campaign and various other right wing entities. It was such a display of immaturity all I could do was laugh. I am a firm believer in standing behind your words and think it's very amusing when people can't come right out and TELL me that they don't agree with me; instead they sign me up for a ton of email listings that are supposed to show me the "truth" or something.
In the meantime, while I'm busy deleting emails, I'll be waiting for the coward(s) who signed me up to come to their senses and realize that standing behind their words and their beliefs is FAR more influential than typing in someone's email address and sitting back and snickering.
In a passionate fit, I posted a few things on facebook about our congresspeople working for us and how to contact them, I also posted that religion has no place in government because of one of the main principles this country was founded on; separation of church and state. For the record, I'm "Christian-ish" I believe in God, I think the bible is a decent book to guide your life on and I believe that above all, we ought to love one another and treat each other the way we want to be treated.
Imagine my shock when I opened up my email last night to find a "welcome" email from the Christian Coalition. Someone apparently thought I needed a good dose of Jesus in my life. Not only did they sign me up, the also created an account for me-one that I cannot log into because I don't have the password, so until I can get a hold of someone at the CC and prove to them that it was not ME signing up, I'm stuck getting these damn emails (well, in my spam folder anyway, ha ha) I really cannot imagine what would possess someone to sign me up for something like this-I mean, honest to God, I'm happy to listen to your views if you want to talk to me about them. I have great respect for other peoples' religious beliefs even if I don't necessarily agree with them.
Of course, I'm not TOO surprised by the fact that I've started receiving these sorts of emails again; after all during election season when I made it clear that I was a full supporter of Barack Obama I received many many MANY emails from the McCain campaign, the right to life campaign, Sarah Palin's campaign and various other right wing entities. It was such a display of immaturity all I could do was laugh. I am a firm believer in standing behind your words and think it's very amusing when people can't come right out and TELL me that they don't agree with me; instead they sign me up for a ton of email listings that are supposed to show me the "truth" or something.
In the meantime, while I'm busy deleting emails, I'll be waiting for the coward(s) who signed me up to come to their senses and realize that standing behind their words and their beliefs is FAR more influential than typing in someone's email address and sitting back and snickering.
Saturday, March 19, 2011
Ooooh Fat Bottom Girls You Make the Rockin' World Go 'Round
I am not what one would call "skinny" "slim" or "slender" In fact, I'm more on the "festivally plump" size, I have some junk in my trunk, a wiggle in my walk, I have curves and then some. I am a fattie fattie two by four, couldn't get through the kitchen door. BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH I have a fat ass, I like to eat, and I pretty much don't care who doesn't like it.
That being said, I want to be healthy and working out is a great way for me to be more healthy. A few weeks ago, Geo and I joined our local gym. It's wonderful, I feel good, I have more energy, etc etc. I love swimming laps in the pool, then hopping in the hot tub for a soak. Finally, I strip off my suit and soak up the heat and steam of the sauna. It's good for my body and soul. I then take a nice hot shower, get dressed, and get back to "real" life.
I have no problem with nudity in the locker room-it's a LOCKER ROOM, of course there's going to be nudity, right? I am so sad, though, to see that most of the women in that place are so insecure that they'd rather get dressed in a wet shower than walk through the locker room in a towel and dare show their bodies to anyone. It's taken me a long time to get to the point where I accept my body and love it. This body has grown and nurtured two children; it's been through a lot, I consider my stretch marks marks of battle; MY awesome amazing body created two amazing children and THEY are physical reminders of it.
The women who are most likely to walk around the locker room in a towel without worrying about who is looking at them? Women my age and older; with age comes wisdom and apparently so does loving your own body. I wish I could go back to my late teenage self and tell me to love myself and love the way I'm made. I know I'll never be stick skinny and that's perfectly fine. I'd be completely and utterly out of balance if I weighed 100 pounds (never mind I wouldn't have anything to wear except maybe some of Gabe's tshirts LOL) I spent a long time trying to cover my body and feeling ashamed of it and it's time I cannot get back-so from this moment forward, I'm loving my shape and my body and anyone who doesn't like it can kiss my big ole' backside :P
That being said, I want to be healthy and working out is a great way for me to be more healthy. A few weeks ago, Geo and I joined our local gym. It's wonderful, I feel good, I have more energy, etc etc. I love swimming laps in the pool, then hopping in the hot tub for a soak. Finally, I strip off my suit and soak up the heat and steam of the sauna. It's good for my body and soul. I then take a nice hot shower, get dressed, and get back to "real" life.
I have no problem with nudity in the locker room-it's a LOCKER ROOM, of course there's going to be nudity, right? I am so sad, though, to see that most of the women in that place are so insecure that they'd rather get dressed in a wet shower than walk through the locker room in a towel and dare show their bodies to anyone. It's taken me a long time to get to the point where I accept my body and love it. This body has grown and nurtured two children; it's been through a lot, I consider my stretch marks marks of battle; MY awesome amazing body created two amazing children and THEY are physical reminders of it.
The women who are most likely to walk around the locker room in a towel without worrying about who is looking at them? Women my age and older; with age comes wisdom and apparently so does loving your own body. I wish I could go back to my late teenage self and tell me to love myself and love the way I'm made. I know I'll never be stick skinny and that's perfectly fine. I'd be completely and utterly out of balance if I weighed 100 pounds (never mind I wouldn't have anything to wear except maybe some of Gabe's tshirts LOL) I spent a long time trying to cover my body and feeling ashamed of it and it's time I cannot get back-so from this moment forward, I'm loving my shape and my body and anyone who doesn't like it can kiss my big ole' backside :P
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