For as long as there've been parents and children, there's been "mom-petition" (read: competition among moms) Anywhere you go that there's a group of mommas together, there's bound to be the one upping that most moms can't seem to resist. I'm guilty of being a mom-petitor (what an annoying word) sometimes I just get caught up in the moment and the next thing I hear myself say is "well Gabe was 2 days old when he walked, take that" (lie)
It's something that goes with the territory so it's not shocking in the least for me when it happens. HOWEVER it *is* shocking to see/hear/read that sort of behavior in the special needs parenting circle. For the most part, special needs parents stick together; we boost each other up, we listen, we vent-we don't compete over whose kid is more disabled or gets more services, etc (which makes me wonder, why in the heck do we do it with parents of NT kids???) The special needs parenting circle is a pretty tight knit community; even when you've just met a parent who is part of that "group" there's an instant camaraderie; there's no competing, there's no "oh yeah, well" it's more of a "who is your doctor?" "what services does your child get?" etc sort of thing. A few weeks back I met the mom of a little girl Bitsy's age who had kick ass orthodics for her shoes. I started talking to her and ended up with a good suggestion as to where to go for GOOD orthodics-it was great.
As some of you know, I run a really large group for special needs parents online. It's a really great community; people come looking for info, for a shoulder to cry on, for the camaraderie that they may not be getting in "real" life...but today a mom-petitor showed up...and I'm pleased to say that my fellow SN mommas fought back; they called her out on her crap and made sure she KNEW it wasn't acceptable-I'm so proud of them! But to tell the truth, it shouldn't have happened-and honestly, it needs to stop among ALL parents, not just in the SN community. So my promise to myself, to my fellow moms, both to SN and NT kiddos is that I am going to try my best to NOT compete with you. Even *if* SarahAnne knew all the words to the Star Spangled Banner at the age of 7 hours old (lie, again) I promise not to tell you that...can you do the same?