Wednesday, February 10, 2010

It was a bug day

My friend and I have a little "code word" system for how our day has been. If it's a "bug" day, it's been bad, if it's a "windshield" day, it's a good day :) (as in: sometimes you're the windshield and sometimes you're the bug)

Yesterday was truly a BUG day. We had winter storm warnings in effect, we had to take Geo to work so we could use the car (yay one car families) and Gabe needed to see his occupational and physical therapists. As it turned out, Gabe ended up needing to be casted because his range of motion was in the negative degrees (Normal range of motion is 20 degrees, he was in a BAD way yesterday) We ended up at the rehab hospital (where he does therapy) for almost five hours, which was fine since it was snowing and blowing like crazy outside.

On the way into therapy, we stopped to have lunch and SarahAnne asked me, quietly, "Why does bruhby have to wear braces on his legs? They aren't nice and they hurt him" How in the world do you answer that? I answered with "His legs aren't as strong as they should be, so the braces help him walk and run better" She accepted it with a shrug but hugged him when we got back to the table.

Then at therapy, upon learning he'd need a cast, Gabe flipped out. He told me in no uncertain terms that he was NOT getting a cast and he was not going to be happy if he did. Bits, the little momma, patted his back and said "It's okay, it's alright, it will help you"

We got the cast and headed home, with one very angry Gabriel in the backseat. He and I had the conversation I've been dreading for the last six years. The "why am I different" conversation I was hoping to NOT have to deal with a)right now and b)by myself.

It went something like this:
Gabe: I hate this stupid cast and I don't want it on

Mom: I know honey, but you have to, it makes your leg stronger

Gabe: Why do I have to have a cast, no one else does?

Mom: Because Gabe, when God made you, you had a hole in your spine, it's not fair, it really stinks, but it happened and now we deal with it and every once in a while you're going to have to have a cast so your leg works like everyone else's.

Gabe: I DON'T WANT A HOLE IN MY SPINE! IT'S NOT FAIR I DON'T LIKE THIS HOLE

Mom: *trying not to cry*

Gabe: It's not fair, no one else has a hole in their spine and I hate this. I don't like this cast and I don't like the hole.

Mom: I know Gabe, I know, I don't like it either.

And then he was silent for the rest of the trip. If you know Gabe, you know this is *not* normal. The child is a chatter box, especially in the car. My poor baby, in so much pain, both physically (it hurts to stretch like he was stretched) and emotionally. It had to be the worst feeling I think I've ever experienced, nothing I could do or say would ease his pain. Truly, a bug day :(

This morning, thankfully, he's in a better mood. He just took a marker and wrote his name on his cast and said that it's "cool" because he knows he's stretching and growing, so that's something. Maybe this morning's excitement shook him out of his funk-literally shook him. We had an earthquake this morning. First a blizzard, now an earth quake. Yes, in Northern Illinois, a 4.3 on the Richter scale, earthquake. So weird.

Today has the making of a "windshield day" for sure...I just hope it keeps up that way.

1 comment:

Eri said...

Well, I can't stop crying now. My love to Gabe and Bits. How sweet of her to be so concerned about her brother. *love* to all of you.

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